Janelle Dakota

Introducing Jane Latta

2009-02-06T17:37:00.000-08:00

I've had so much fun as Janelle Dakota: short story contests, web classes, online buddies, two novels - each revised thrice. So many great scenes and wonderful characters! I've had publications with Echelon Press and an honorable mention from Lunch Hour Stories. All very much fun and the bonus is these experiences provided the necessary professional growth.

But...

My muse threw me a curve ball and it made me stop and think. When a voice in your head screams, "Yoohoo! Wrong genre!" you tend to listen, or at least give the declaration a few minutes' consideration. Which is why I'm switching to YA.

Viewed in the YA light, I can see the element that was dangling just out of reach in my two novels, and this excites me. I can't begin to tell you how many hundreds of pages I've written with these characters, trying to make them fit the wrong mold!

That was step one. Step two involved a bit of emotional healing and personal growth. My parents were both proud of my writing and they believed in me. It is in honor of them that I renounce my pseudonym and embrace my given name.

Check out at my new blog:

http://janelatta.blogspot.com/

Guest Blogger

2009-01-21T21:51:00.000-08:00

Today, I offer up the prose of my ten year old daughter, Hannah. Enjoy!

1998 –2008 My First Ten Years
A memoir by Hannah Roberts

There were a lot of things I couldn’t do when I was little.

When I was 5 the deep end of the pool was dark, mysterious, and scary to me.
Now I happily dive in.

When I was 6 I could only see the top of my head in the bathroom mirror.
Now I am almost as tall as my mom.

When I was 7 I couldn’t bounce a basketball without losing control.
Now I play on a basketball team called the Eagles.

When I was 8 I loved to play Barbies with my friends. Now I think Barbie dolls are kinda dumb.

When I was 9 I cried about my dog dying…. yeah I’d still do that!

Now I am 10 and I know that friendship means we stick together no matter what, my parents may not always know what they’re doing, and even if I can’t do a lot of things, I can learn how.

Miss You Mom!

2009-01-14T16:09:00.000-08:00

Miss You Mom!

Another poem

2008-12-22T02:26:00.000-08:00

Quick update: I lost internet after a switch to a new ISP. Everyone's computer but mine could connect. Nobody knew how to fix it. I seem to have poor luck with anything electronic these days! But all is well now.

We're experiencing one of the biggest snow storms Seattle has ever seen. I have a foot of snow at my house. I love the hush that snow provides, but if I lose my power I suspect the snow will lose its beauty.

Sean has done it again! I like this poem very much. In this English assignment, his poem needed to portray a paradox. I think he also manages a bit of a transformation here as well. No, he is not an angst-filled teen; he is actually a well-adjusted young man with a great imagination, the inability to put his dirty socks in the clothes hamper, and a little too much RPG experience :)

Death
By Sean Roberts

Life is existence.
Living.
Breathing.
Sleeping.
But, is it really life?
Are you free?
Do you have power?
Are you always happy?
Are you sure?

Death is nonexistence.
Your soul,
Your spirit,
Living in an invisible world,
Spying on the ones,
Who appear to be living.
Watching as the world unravels.
Watching as new souls are prepared for torture.
Knowing that soon,
It will be your turn again.

Is it truly life we experience?
Or is it death?
Vessels to a spirit who cannot roam free,
A spirit waiting to get out,
Waiting to live as it pleases,
Not needing food,
Not experiencing pain,
Not experiencing sadness,
Able to live with freedom.

Life is Death.

Sit, Stay, Hyperlink

2008-12-11T00:11:00.000-08:00

For today's joy-finding expedition, I didn't have to go far! I'm trying out the gift of knowledge and the fact that this old dog can learn a new trick. Here's my attempt at putting Madison Leigh's name in link format. Woohoo! It worked!

Thank you Elysabeth and CJ :)

It gets easier with practice

2008-12-09T23:03:00.000-08:00

Today's unexpected joy came easily: the devotion of friends.

My friend Madison Leigh (I wish I knew how to do that thing where her name is underlined and it's a link to her blog) did a little research on a problem I've been having. She put a few bits of information together and connected it to something else and voila! A clue that I can use to try to find some answers.

Thank you, Madison!

Purple Is All That It Should Be

2008-12-08T23:22:00.000-08:00

Oops - I missed 2 days! I forgot to factor in the weekend element. One of those days was a fun-filled family day, but I don't think it's fair to "go back" so I'll just pick up where I left off.

My 14 year old son wrote a poem for school and has graciously given me permission to post it here. It made me think and it made me smile so it's my "focus" option of the day. His assignment was to choose a color and write a poem about it. He chose my favorite color :)

The Color Purple
By Sean Roberts

The gentle blaze of a fire,
To a skier trapped in the snow.
The grace of an angel,
To a fallen soldier,
Purple rewards the patient.
Purple saves the punished.

Purple is all that it should be,
The regalia of royalty,
The symbol of patience,
The image of justice,
The emblem of hope and peace,
The pattern of prosperity,
The insignia of bliss,
The mark of a higher power
For all who have earned it,
Purple is all that it should be.

Multiplication

2008-12-05T22:42:00.000-08:00

I set out to find one positive, uplifting moment from today and ended up having a hard time narrowing the field. Here are just a few things that brought me unexpected joy, in no particular order:

Internet shopping (less hassle!)
talking to my other sister today and laughing together
my cuddly dog

Although I'm tempted to tell you how the "good" things just kept piling up - like something funny my son said, how my husband kept sending me bad Seahawks jokes today, and catching my daughter in an act of kindness - I think instead I'll try to focus on a few "good" moments at a time and really absorb them.

Don't say nothin at all

2008-12-04T23:12:00.001-08:00

Remember Thumper? If you can't say something nice...

That's why I haven't been updating my blog. I realized today that I didn't want to post anything negative on my blog, and with the stuff that's been happening in my life lately, I honestly couldn't think of anything positive to say.

I was driving at the time and the thought had such a profound affect on me that I almost slammed on the brakes.

Bad things happen all the time. We are all surrounded by negativity, stress, unpleasantness. The only control we have over the negativity is how we allow it to impact our lives, right?

But heck I wouldn't even torture my characters the way I've been tortured this year! The deaths of pets, friends and family; a devastating loss of income; head-to-toe hives...? First of all, no one would believe my life in story form if I even had the desire to write it, which I don't. Second, the melodrama is just too far-fetched. Third -- oh, wait; I had a point to this rant.

For one week, I'm going to post a "positive" thing that happened during each day. A good thought. A kind word. A small accomplishment. Something uplifting that stands out from the rest of the day. Then I'm going to see if the act of shifting focus has an impact on my life. I don't expect my perspective to banish the bad, but perhaps it will turn my health around. It certainly can't hurt. And if it makes the spots go away, I'll be very happy.

Let's see...today...

One thing that stands out from the day is hugging my sister, because she needed it - and the wonderful feeling that a hug from me means a lot to her and vice versa.

May I Have the Keys to the Literary Kingdom, Please?

2008-11-11T19:00:00.000-08:00

I have been having an identity crisis and I have no one to blame but myself.

In April of 2008, I attended my first writing conference and the world shifted on its axis. Did you feel it? I don’t see how anyone could have missed it. There was this l-o-n-g moment when the world stopped turning, and when it started up again, everything looked different. Suddenly, I could visualize my dream of becoming a Real Writer. And then the conference I went to last month had the effect of dangling a key just out of a prisoner’s reach. I could see my greatest desire, but even while I was surrounded by scores of supportive writers, I knew the four walls of my self-imposed prison would hem me in once I stepped back into my own reality (self-fulfilling prophecies are remarkably dependable). With great fear and stubborn determination, I soaked up the conference atmosphere like a drunk on a three day bender. I pitched my novel to Kevan Lyon of the Sandra Dijkstra Literary Agency and then, in a moment of reckless abandon, I accepted Cherry Adair’s “Write the Damn Book” challenge.

Please don’t misunderstand me: I am happy with who I am. I love my family and my life but I want – no, I need – to figure out how to make the transition from hobbyist to professional; to make writing an integral part of every day, not just something I do in my spare time; to stop treating writing like a dirty secret and bring it out into the open.

You know how much I love short stories. They are the perfect venue for the hobbyist writer. On a lazy Saturday afternoon, I can create a first draft and then spend the week toying with the story elements. For longer, meatier short stories, the semantics alone can consume months of Saturdays. All the while, new story ideas are brewing and the creative cycle repeats itself. Aside from NaNoWriMo month (November, for those of you non-WriMos), thus has been the extent of my writing for the past five years: a weekend here, an evening there, but otherwise, just a hobby. Oh, sure, I’d go through periods of binge-writing and have an occasional inspiration to enter a contest, but I always fell back into my usual routine of duty before hobby.

To be fair to myself, I have been a dedicated hobby novelist in the last year, with only a few brief diversions into short stories, but I tried to treat my novel writing like my short story writing and discovered that the two are very different from one another. Very different. My organic, spiral writing method isn't the most effective way to write a novel, but I have learned from successful writers that it can work and, as you may recall from paragraph two, I possess a stubborn determination.

So, while my fellow WriMos are dedicating this month, National Novel Writing Month, to the intoxicating infatuation of developing a new story, I am instead dedicating the month to developing a new writer: me.

Post-conference thoughts

2008-10-19T02:01:00.000-07:00

What a conference! The Emerald City Writers' Conference was the BUSIEST conference I've been to so far! Probably because this is the first conference where I've volunteered to work :) I enjoyed the work, but I found it challenging to get to any of the workshops. I was only able to attend a few: Allison Brennan, Jennifer Ashley, and Julia Quinn. I spent a lot of time pouring champagne up in the hospitality suite, chatting with out-of-towners and making new friends. GSRWA is an incredible chapter. Soooo many successful, motivated authors and all of them willing to help you realize your dream. I love them already!

The editors and agents held a panel discussion on Friday night after dinner and I enjoyed hearing the "other side" of the writing business. It's a funny thing: writers and publishers are dependent upon each other. Why is there such a big gap between them? Thank God for agents and editors! I didn't hear anything new from the panel, but it gave me a chance to get to know them each a little better. For instance, I found out that they're all human and not, in fact, superheroes. This cut the intimidation factor back quite a bit.

After agonizing over my pitch for a week, I finally decided to trust my own instincts. I found a short pitch that included the main plot points, encapsulated a bit of the tone of Err Apparent, and sounded like something I would say. I didn't trip over the words. The best news was that my appointment was with my first choice: Kevan Lyon of the Sandra Dijkstra Agency (The Sandra Dijkstra Agency!!! Diane Mott Davidson! Lisa See! Amy Tan! Need I say more?). That made my day. I'd already researched the SDLA and just needed to know how to get an appointment. So obviously, I was anxious to get an appointment with Kevan Lyon. Of all the editors and agents at the conference, she was THE fit for me considering Err Apparent is an urban mystery with a strong romantic element and Falling Short is a mainstream women's fiction with a small romantic element.

I realized rather quickly that it must be difficult for Kevan to remember any one person she sees at these group appointments. She immediately put us all at ease, and I breezed through my first pitch without any trouble. One drawback to the group pitch is you really don't get a chance to get to know each other at all. All I have to go on is the way she portrayed herself during the editor/agent panel and the few minutes during the group pitch.

She didn't do anything hideous; come to think of it, that's pretty much all she can say about me, too. Which is good.

I'm giving myself a week to polish the first 50 pages (again) and rewrite my synopsis. Currently, the synopsis is written as a series of notes for myself, so I have a bit of work to do to turn it into good reading material. As soon as I send that off, I need to finish the revisions to Err Apparent so I can start on the novel I pledged to write at Cherry Adair's Write the Damn Book challenge. Since Falling Short is going to take a complete rewrite (what else is new?), I figure it's the perfect book to write after Err Apparent is off to my trusted beta readers.

Motivational tip of the day: Cherry Adair said, "If you can't write a page a day, what the hell are you doing at this conference?" I have soooo many ideas for other stories, so it's tempting to start something new, especially after a conference when you feel like anything is possible. Work on three novels at once? Sure! Why not? Alas, I make notes and write random scenes to save for later.

November is coming...NaNoWriMo...Allison Brennan made me feel better about the way I write my novels. She said it takes her 300,000 words to write a 100,000 word book. I'm glad I'm not the only writer who has to write organically. My short stories are always that way; why did I think novels would be any different?

Back to work, polishing and rewriting.

ECWC Conference

2008-10-09T15:19:00.000-07:00

I'm off to the Emerald City Writer's Conference in the morning. An entire weekend, devoted to writing! I get to stow my other hats in the closet and just be a writer. Wow!

This week, I've been working on my pitch for Err Apparent. Had I known the pitch would be so difficult to write, I'd have started a month ago! I think some writers find the pitch or query very easy to do, but for most of us, it's agony.

to be blunt, it's been a learning process for me. I've had to think about what is at the core of my story, and what makes my story unique. I'm a panster, not a plotter, so I don't have a detailed outline or long synopsis. I have...well, I have the story. What else do I need? LOL!

With the help of my WIP group (Writers in Progress), my one-sentence blurb has gone from "an urban romantic mystery about a woman who works at an art gallery who is framed for the murder of a wealthy gallery client" (blech) to "Framed as a murderer, gallery assistant Rebecca Allyn needs to redraw the lines between herself and her politician father, and paint the cop she dare not love out of the picture."

You see what I mean about the learning experience ;)

I'll try to post my two-minute elevator pitch, but I keep changing it - again, with the help of the WIPpettes.

Off to pack and tweak my pitch and then try to get some sleep. Conferences are so exciting! But I will miss my dear friends Madison Leigh and Viansa Blake. They were so much fun at the NECRWA conference.

These things sneak up on you

2008-10-05T01:26:00.000-07:00

The revisions are going much more slowly than I'd hoped, but I should give myself some credit for all the muddling-through I've done. I now have 8 chapters that are clean and revised to the plot changes. Considering what I've gone through since May, I guess I should give myself a bit of grace. But I discovered that there was something getting in my way of the revisions: ME.

See, I guess I didn't give myself any time to actually absorb the losses of my parents. I kept skimming over the emotional drama, focusing on what needed to be done. I kept myself busy, in family life and writing life, working on the plot of my novel, honing character goals, zooming in on the conflict and story arc. All very good avoidance techniques. I've LOOKED like I was handling my losses. I've talked about handling them, but I just kept going and going and going and finally, I couldn't cope, emotionally. Classic, huh?

Today, I feel like I'm getting my life back together. Funny thing is, I wasn't aware that it was falling apart. Being a writer, I wrote my way through it: I opened a vein and bleed on the page. It helped.

My first hurdle was to accept that I am not ready to find an agent to sign with and that's not the end of the world. I imagine it's okay if I use the group agent appointment as a learning experience, a practice run, a place to learn about the business end of the craft. I'll ask if it's okay to pitch my story, just for practice.

I'm very excited to be attending the Emerald City Writer's Conference Oct 10-12th! Everyone I've met from the GSRWA has been delightful, funny, enthusiastic, and successful --- ohmygosh these writers are driven! They are a motivating bunch. I don't write romances (although my stories all seem to have a relationship at the heart), but if you want to learn the business of writing and selling novels, the best place to start learning is to become a member of RWA and start attending chapter meetings and conferences. These writers know the ins and outs of the craft, and they are the most welcoming and FUN bunch of writers you'll ever meet.

Totally random thoughts

2008-09-11T21:48:00.000-07:00

Sorry - I've sort of filled this in throughout the last two days as time permitted. I think I'll leave it as is, even though it's rough and raw. Enjoy!

There's a gremlin following me around. Everything electronic that I touch is doomed to failure and I blame MySpace.

I bet you think I'm kidding.

Ever since I first created a MySpace page, I've been plagued with computer troubles. I can't visit MyPage without having MyComputer lock up. I get viruses every time I try to update the page or reply to messages. Friends and relations have no troubles with their pages, but mine is evil. I'd blast the sinister thing into the MySpace graveyard if I thought I could do it without toasting another hard drive.

So my beautiful new computer - the one I bought after MySpace burned up my last laptop - is crippled. I love my HP Pavilion Notebook PC, but I'm thinking seriously about a Mac. I am so darn sick and tired of viruses. Every time I get hit with one, I lose at least a week of writing. I can't sync my Blackberry to my PC because the software won't load. I can't load my new Zep CD on my iPod. Outlook Express freezes up on me half the time, so I shut down and restart and get the same messages over and over. I can't run a virus scan without removing and reinstalling my virus software every time. And on and on and on. It never ends!

But on to other things :)

The Emerald City Writers Conference is less than a month away. I'm so excited to be attending this conference! Last weekend, I attended my first ever GSRWA meeting and all I can say is -WOW! What a great bunch of writers! I say that not just because they've all been fun to get to know, but because there are so many productive, successful writers in the group. I find it very motivating to hear what's working for other writers, how they've persevered through the submissions process and succeeded. One writer said, "Whew! And I thought writing was hard!"

Normally, fall is a productive time of year for me. I've been going through the motions, but not getting as much done as I'd like, probably because there are some days when I still feel like I'm on autopilot. On the way to the parent/child book club today (yes, I started that up again even though I'm loaded down pretty heavy as it is) my daughter Hannah started crying about missing Grampa and I joined in. And all day Monday, I had to field the question, "How was your summer?" I totally wasn't prepared to answer that yet.

I volunteered to be the team parent for my son Sean's football team. It's a small job, but to me it's huge. Taking on anything right now is huge to me, but I have to get out there and do it. Life goes on. I also attended a PTA meeting tonight. With both parents' illnesses last year, I could never fit a PTA meeting into my schedule. This year, I want to be involved. Sean is a great student and loves going to school. My goal with Hannah this year is to teach her the self-discipline a good student needs.

There is absolutely no closure for a random post like this! LOL if this were a draft of a story, I'd wad it up and toss it in the recycle bin!

Energized by productivity

2008-08-24T17:20:00.000-07:00

It's amazing how energized I feel when I get some writing done.

With all the demands on my time, I often feel as if I have to "steal" writing time. Part of me thinks that's a mommy-guilt stereotype, but there is always an element of truth to stereotypes. I am definitely not a stereotypical wife, mom, sister, friend, daughter, etc. so I can't imagine I'd follow any stereotypes. Still, one can't ignore the element of truth: my family is my first priority. I can't just pretend they don't exist, and usually, I don't need to. We coexist peaceably, the wife and mommy and writer and me.

However, something about this past summer's emotional turmoil made it hard for me to assume my writerly role full time, or even part time. My writerly self barely existed. So here I was, ready to get back to the novel, and my life had revolved around everyone else and all the things that needed to be done for 3 months. Getting my writing time back was not easy. I had to physically remove myself from my family in order to get anything done. I had to put my foot down and make it known that I WAS WRITING!

Let's hope the transition is complete and I don't have to do that again. Although, I must admit, it was fun to go sit in the B&N Cafe, sip a mocha, and do nothing but write. I could get used to that....

Hello, Old Blog

2008-08-14T21:23:00.000-07:00

I'm trying to get my old routines back after the crazy summer I've had. We're gearing up for the school year, I'm rushing to my self-imposed deadline, and I'm still (of course) going through the process of grieving. But life is good. More later.

Goodbyes

2008-07-27T21:35:00.000-07:00

It was bound to happen. The events of the last 5 months caught up with me and I could not figure out what to say on my blog.

I still don't know what to say. I guess I'll free-write and see what happens.

My mother Sarah died on July 14th. I flew to Mexico on the 15th. After spending the first night tossing back tequila shots in Mom's honor and waking up with a brutal headache at 4:30 in the morning, my sisters and I spent a week at Mom's house.

Her house was hollow without her there. I experienced my first intense moment of loss.

We boxed, sent, donated, signed, arranged, informed, and planned: all the things we are still in the process of doing for our father's affairs, and, sadly, still going through for my sister's husband. There are so many little things to take care of when someone dies. My brother stopped in now and again (he and his wife stayed at a hotel). We began the process of mourning together. Don't get me wrong: we had some great laughs, my sisters and I, but we all decided we're getting sick of this end-of-life business.

We don't want to be "strong" anymore.

Sisters are a blessing. As I said to a friend of mine in an email, those of us who have sisters know how truly wonderful it is to be able to love someone unconditionally. My sisters and I have had our differences but they've never marred our love for each other and seldom interfered in our relationships. In the past 5 months, we've leaned heavily upon each other. Sisters are there for each other, period.

One of the reasons I haven't posted on my blog is because I've been troubled by someone's very rude behavior during this difficult time in my life, behavior that was hurtful. Over the last week, I've asked myself many times what I should do about this person and I keep arriving at the same conclusion: let it go and move on. I don't need negativity in my life. I'm sad to see the relationship dissolve, but one thing I've learned is that my contentment is not dependent upon the actions of others; it lies within me.

With the negativity behind me, and the grieving resumed, I was finally able to get in a good chunk of writing time today.

Stepping Stones

2008-07-02T22:50:00.000-07:00

I've stalled posting on my blog for weeks. I told myself I was waiting for things to calm down a bit, but I suspect I've not posted because I've wanted to avoid going through emotions I'm not sure I'm capable of expressing.

From the 19th to the 26th, I was in Mexico with my mother. I've posted before about her cancer. Our visit this time was bittersweet: we found a fulfilling end to our relationship. Through the simple act of caring for her physical needs during these final days of her life, she and I bonded in a way that can only happen when you've stripped away all the aspects of this earthly life until all that remains is the fact that life ends. Things that seemed important fall away, and you have only the love and the need to ease pain.

As I write this, I'm waiting for the call from one of my sisters or my brother, telling me that her suffering is over. I think that's why I've put off posting on my blog, although I don't know why. Finality, maybe? Closure?

Just 4 weeks ago - a few days after my father's death -my mother sent me an email about my father's memorial:
"I will miss having your dad here in this world, too. We were married for 22 years, and a lot of those years were good years. And as I told him, I would always love him for giving me 4 marvelous children. Without him, you 4 wouldn't be here."

She asked me to share these words at my father's memorial. On the 25th, my two sisters arrived in Mexico to help me with my mother's care. I returned home to Seattle late at night on the 26th in order to prepare for my father's memorial service. On the 27th, my sister Nancy was at the Mazatlan airport, boarding the same flight my brother Michael took to Mexico to be with our mother. Nancy and Michael shared tears and touched their hands on the glass separating the international arrivals from the departures. Michael and his wife Patty are there to say their own goodbyes and to help my sister Kathy who had requested to be with Mom at the end.

So on Saturday, June 28th, the day that would have been my father's 81st birthday, we held his memorial services. Nancy and I were there in body, Kathy and Michael were there in spirit, and we were surrounded by our family members and our closest friends. The service was beautiful. In her homily, Mother Cynthia captured everything the four of us had rambled about in meetings and emails while we we planned the memorial. After the services, I felt lighter and happy from the joyful celebration of my father's life.

On another day, when I'm not waiting for the phone to ring in the middle of the night, I'll post about seeing my uncle Dan again and my cousin Jim. I'm so glad they travelled from San Jose to Seattle to be at my father's memorial.

Each day of our lives has a purpose. The events of your day may be stepping stones to something you've worked hard to get to, a purpose of your own. But if it's your day to help someone else across the pond, embrace that day as well and live it fully. I believe that my purpose these past 5 weeks has been to help others along on their journey, and if I hadn't allowed myself to be distracted from my own goals, I would have missed so much.

Err Apparent

2008-06-09T19:38:00.000-07:00

I've polished the 7 pages and I'm working on the rest of the story now. And the best news of all is that I've found a better title. Art of Deception fit the first version of this story, before it grew up and became more three-dimensional. The new title fits this storyline. I'm very pleased to announce that the new title for my mystery is:

Err Apparent

According to my dictionary (American Heritage) heir apparent is defined as: an heir whose right to inheritance is indefeasible by law provided he survives his ancestor. Publishers usually change the titles that authors come up with, but I enjoy the play on words and the fact that the new title fits the plot: my main character is being punished for a mistake her father made.

I'll give the 7 pages another polish and then send it off to the contest.

Learning to Walk Again

2008-06-08T13:28:00.000-07:00

Last night, my sisters and I sifted through decades of my father's photos and that was just from one of his many large boxes of photographs. The experience was bittersweet. The memories and the decades of his life surrounded us. Yet how can the vitality and diversity of my father's life be depicted in something as two-dimensional as a photograph? There was so much more to the man than boxes of photographs can reveal to the world: the ups and downs of his life, the people he knew and loved, the dreams he held.

The task of presenting his life in photographs at the memorial seems daunting.

I'll be travelling to Mexico to visit my mom later this month. I feel the clock ticking away the time I have left with her, and with all I'm experiencing in mourning my father, I want to embrace the days she has left.

My house is a mess: the laundry and dishes and vacuuming and dusting have all seemed so unimportant, and the remodel work has been on hiatus. But I think my husband feels the same as I do: it's time to pick up one foot and put it in front of the other. Work and dreams and goals have all been difficult to concentrate on, but now they are welcome distractions. We're easing back into our lives, trying to figure out where we left off.

Madison Leigh encouraged me to look into a local contest. Thank you, Mad :) I'm polishing the first 7 pages of my mystery manuscript in preparation for the GSRW Emerald City Opener Contest. Even though the Emerald City Writer's Conference is in October, the deadline for the contest is only days away, so I'm brainstorming titles. The Art of Deception was only a working title - it fit the very first draft of the story. The revised version is so much better than the first draft that it deserves a more appropriate title.

So, 7 polished pages and a better title. First one foot and then the other.

Say It Again

2008-05-26T00:10:00.000-07:00

I spent the week with my father. He was in the hospital, about half an hour from my home. In 2004 - he would have been 76 then - he needed a pacemaker. In December 2006, he needed a mechanical valve. This time, he needed an ICD, which is a pacemaker and a defibrillator.

Sure, he wasn't happy about being in the hospital. Who is? He was preoccupied with work even though he wasn't feeling good. He wanted to be home with his dog, Tasha. He was angry and frustrated part of the time.

But there were times when we talked to pass the time. He told stories and he laughed and he let the nurses and techs tease him. And there were times when we simply sat and didn't talk at all.

His heart was just too weak, though, and the congestive heart failure too strong. He died last night.

It's cliche, but I wish I could go back to my last conversation with him. He wanted to call his work crew and let them know he wouldn't have any jobs for them this coming week. I told him we could call them Sunday or Monday, but right then he needed to rest. I held his hand and tried to comfort him. But I wish I could have a do-over and say something different.

So I'm going to say it all now:
Thank you for being a loving father. Thank you for setting a good example of how a strong faith in God can help a person find peace and happiness in life and help them gain perspective and a healthy dose of humility. Thank you for telling me you love me, for believing in me and cheering me on, and for being my biggest fan. Thank you for wanting to be a part of my life. It's such a simple thing, to love another person, yet relationships can be complicated. With you, it's easy. Thank you for loving my husband. For loving my children. For admiring me for homeschooling. For allowing me to care for you when you're sick. I admire you, Dad, because you accept your faults and you forgive me for mine. I love your bad jokes. I love how you always sound so happy to see me or to hear my voice on the telephone. I appreciate that you respect me enough not to sugarcoat anything: your honesty shows how much you believe in my strength. I love you, Dad. I'll miss you so very much.

Say it

2008-05-14T13:31:00.000-07:00

As writers, we pull emotions into our writing from experiences - our own and by placing ourselves into the hearts and minds of others, sometimes strangers and sometimes people who never existed at all. Emotion on the page transforms a story from a succession of words to reality in the writer's mind and therefore in the reader's mind. We imagine what it must be like to experience tragedy or comedy; we walk into a different world and picture the sights and sounds; we project ourselves into the future or the past or perhaps just the next town over. But mainly, we envelop ourselves in the emotions of characters we've created, a strange mix of people we know and people we imagine.

I've had plenty of emotional experiences to pull from lately.

Last week, my husband and kids and I traveled to Mexico. My mom wanted to see them one last time. She's nearing the end of her battle with breast cancer. It's hard to imagine that my mom, so real in front of me, so THERE, could possibly not be here in the near future. Cancer isn't a part of who she is; it's an ailment that has pushed its way into her life and invaded her body. An unwelcome guest. An intruder. It's not who she is and it doesn't define her. I want it to go away and leave her alone. But it won't. It's an alien using her body as a host and eventually it will win.

It may take her body, but it won't take my mom away from me, not in the real sense. She will always be a part of my life. All the experiences we've shared, the good and the bad, all that's formed our relationship, will forever be part of me. I am the youngest of her 4 children, and I see her in each of us. What's strong and true in Mom is evident in the way her children are facing the remaining time with her, in how we are banding together and reinforcing our bonds, in how we can laugh and feel the sorrow and the joy of this time.

My siblings and I live near each other in the Seattle area while Mom lives far away in Mexico, a distance that has been difficult for all of us. The demands of job and family here at home add further difficulties. But when I'm down there, it all melts away. I shuck the guilt and the responsibilities slowly, day by day, until all that remains is me and Mom and a peace that makes words unnecessary, but I speak them anyway. Just to let her know one more time.

Field's End Conference Report

2008-05-01T14:04:00.000-07:00

The Field’s End conference differed from the NECRWA in that it was more relaxed which I didn't think was possible. The energy at the RWA conference was palpable. Everyone was so happy and chipper and hyper (oh, wait - maybe that was just me). Here, they were relaxed and chatty. People mingled and chatted, authors and editors all milling about and asking you what you were working on. One woman I spoke with about the two novels I’m working on said something along the lines of, “So often, writers finish something and send it off before they've even had a chance to let the story ripen and find its true potential. It's in the rewrite that the real story is discovered." Her comments made me feel so much better about my year-long revisions! I honestly think my stories weren’t ripe yet, because as I’m revising, I’m discovering a deeper, more meaningful story. Not just fluff and words on the page.

There were maybe a third of the people at this conference as at NECRWA. Maybe that's the only difference in the feeling and mood between the two conferences, because the people at the RWA conference were just as nice...but I think at this one, pretty much everyone there was a writing success story or an independent agent or independent editor or a noted columnist or radio personality or SOMETHING.

One breakout session I attended was so awesome, I could have gone home right after and gotten my money's worth. Jennifer Louden's "Writing Naked (With Your Clothes On): How to nurture your creative truth, romance your muse and get the work done" was - I swear - directed right at me. She's a motivational speaker and her workshop was SRO. I filled 6 pages of standard sized notebook paper. One thing that really resonated with me was her comment not to focus too much on or worry about the market, that there is no HEART in that. She spoke about writing from the heart - and how to GET to your heart, which she calls finding the truth in your writing. She had us free-write, and I discovered some things about my own motivations toward writing. A wonderful moment of self-discovery! But the most valuable things she gave me were steps to take, ways to get my butt in the chair and make my time productive, even if it's only 5 minutes or 15 minutes. A very, very good session and thanks to her, I’m finding ways to write every day!

During the Page One workshop, 11 pages were read and critiqued, but none of them were mine.That's okay, though. I still learned from the session. One thing that ticked me off was some people did not follow the guidelines posted on the website for submission which was one page double spaced. Some people got a good 500 words in there whereas those of us who followed the guidelines could only fit 250-300 words. But that's life. Not everyone follows the rules. Most of the pages read were very well-written, yet there was always something that could be better. I agreed with most of what the 2 critics said, and when I disagreed, it was because there was a great amount of diversity of story types and obviously, just two critics will be limited in their ability to critique based on their genre preferences. They definitely had an element they were comfortable in, and just making the workshop open to "fiction" was too broad a scope for the two critics. There was a stage actor/radio personality who read the pages aloud for all of us to hear. The critics both admitted that reading it was different than hearing it, but I wondered if they could have/should have asked for a second reading. At any rate, what I heard the critics comment on were voice, character, scene, and action. They wanted a distinct voice, an immediate character to relate to, for the opening page to be scenic, and for something to happen. All obvious expectations. However, when a page was in first person, they jumped on voice. When it was in third, they jumped on the action or the setting. I think there's a lesson there.

All in all, a good day, very unlike the fun I had with Mel and Jen, but worth the trip and an enjoyable time with my friend Ellie. We had a lot of laughs and we’re both fired up. I'll end this long missive with a quote from Roy Blount Jr. who was quoting someone else but I didn't catch the name:

"A blank page is God's way of showing us how hard it is to be God."

Workshops and back to work on the novel

2008-04-25T16:49:00.001-07:00

The workshops at tomorrow's Field's End conference look to be informative, and I'm motivated to hear from the variety of presenters. This conference caters to writers of non-fic, fic, and poetry, so it will be much different than the RWA conference that I attended earlier in the month. I'm aiming to attend the following workshops:

Jennifer Louden: Writing Naked (with your clothes on): How to nurture your creative truth, romance your muse, and get the work done. (Note: Devlin ought to enjoy this one ;))
Suzanne Selfors: Finding Your Genre. This one interests me because I'm writing both a mystery and a women's fiction.
Page One: Fiction; with Laura Kalpakian and Alice Acheson, moderated by Sheila Rabe. During the Page One workshop, the presenters will pull from first-page samples anonymously submitted by workshop attendees and critique before the group. I will be submitting the *current* first page of Falling Short, but they don't get a chance to critique all of the submissions.

Beyond the world of conferences and workshops, I've made progress on Deception. Presenting the first page of Falling Short to my critique group has been constructive and it's fueled my interest in that story as well. I can't continue to bounce back and forth, however, so I am determined to keep at Deception until I feel it's ready for a full MS review. With family commitments and all, I've made embarrassingly slow progress since the first of the year.

On a personal note, I adopted a new exercise schedule when the spring weather finally arrived. It's been a long road to wellness since my adrenals gave out in May of '05. This past week I've been rather sore but thankful that I can push myself a little further each day. For the first time in 3 years, I'm hopeful about getting in shape.

One thing leads to another

2008-04-17T15:50:00.001-07:00

At the NECRWA conference, I had the opportunity to chat with Susan Wiggs (http://www.susanwiggs.com/). Susan is the author of many books, one of them Table For Five, which I just read and enjoyed so much I immediately passed it along to a woman sitting next to me on the airplane. Susan is from the Pacific Northwest, too, and she encouraged me to look into Field's End, a conference in our area.

I did, and I'm registered. Susan, it was your pictures that sold me! Who can resist such a beautiful setting? (To find out about this conference, go to http://www.fieldsend.org/).

My friend Ellie is going to attend with me. It didn't take any arm-twisting. All I did was email her the conference info and she called and said, "I want to go!" I'm looking forward to spending the whole day with Ellie. It's been...gosh...since my Tyler days...? *Snicker* are you wondering what my "Tyler days" were? Hint: Tyler was tall, dark, full of himself, and terrified of my husband.

That was fun :) On to my writing ~

I'm applying the work I did a few weeks ago, where I nailed down some elements of the plot that desperately needed to be nailed down. KEY elements, like whodunit. Writing a mystery is not like writing a more literary story where the plot is character-driven (my other novel is women's fic). While it was fun writing a mystery and being in the dark myself, I fear I've wasted an awful lot of time. And words. A few of the changes I made dovetail right into the existing MS; others require a bit more work, but that's okay. I keep telling myself that I don't have to get every word PERFECT on this draft, but then I linger and agonize over scenes, trying to figure out why it doesn't resonate the way I want it to. I need to stop lingering and just get the changes down and into this draft and THEN go back and rework the scenes.

One more thing: the world may be getting smaller thanks to the internet, but it can't overcome the distance between me and my writing friends. The drawback to belonging to an international writing group is that the face-to-face meetings are few and far between. Instead of being filled with gratefulness for the opportunity to meet two of my longtime internet friends - which I should be - I'm feeling the empty, lifeless air of the miles that separate us.

Maybe a trip to Starbucks will fill that void...

NECRWA Conference

2008-04-15T13:49:00.000-07:00

For my first conference, I couldn't have chosen a better conference to attend. The workshops applied to all genres: going deeper with point of view, setting as metaphor, weaving in backstory artfully, critiquing, the business of writing. The guest speakers were witty and insightful. Everyone was approachable. And meeting my friends? Well, that was worth every penny spent.

What I found at this conference was validation. To describe the validation in cliche: Writing is a lonely business. I can't think of a better way to describe it. Like all other writers, I pour my heart and soul onto the page and hope that someone will enjoy the words I've conjured into (hopefully) living, breathing characters. Publication is wonderful, as are critique groups, for making you feel like a real writer, but a conference makes you feel like you're part of the writing community.

More later. I still need to process all that I experienced! The fun with my friends, the professional input, the increased motivation...there's just too much to fit down in one post.

NECRWA Conference

2008-04-06T13:52:00.000-07:00

ONLY ONE MORE DAY!

It feels like I've spent days getting ready, from making arrangements for the kids for while I'm gone to deciding what shoes to wear with my LBD.

On the road

2008-04-03T13:10:00.000-07:00

The NECRWA conference is next weekend! I'm getting excited. I'll be travelling all the way across the country on Monday and staying with my writing friend Madison Leigh. Another of the members of our international writing group will be joining us at the conference. Mad and Jen and I have been busy emailing about our upcoming visit.

This will not be the first time I've travelled alone since my adrenal failure in May of 2005, but it will be the first time I've travelled alone to somewhere I've never been. You would think travelling to a foreign country on my own would have been the more intimidating experience, but there are a few aspects of this trip that have me a bit nervous. I'll be flying into Providence, renting a car, and driving to my friend's house in Massachusetts. Eek! But I'm a big girl, and I have a GPS navigation system with my friend's address already plugged in. Right now as I sit in my house in the Pacific Northwest, it tells me I have 2,454 miles to my destination.

On the aspect of writing, I have not done much of anything. I feverishly scribbled down the start of a longish short story, the one my muse handed to me when he should have been concentrating on one or the other of my novels in progress. To say that this short story is outside of my usual would be an understatement. Near as I can tell, this one takes place in the late forties or early fifties and is set in a tropical climate, most likely somewhere in South America. And it begins with the aftermath of an earthquake.

I think I'll let that story simmer for a while and get back to my mystery.

Devlin, the evil muse

2008-03-27T00:18:00.000-07:00

My muse is evil. Faithful blog readers will remember that I dubbed him Devlin. His recent actions have given me vindication for my choice of a name.

He's engaged me in a short story when I should be concentrating on taxes, or at the very least, I should be concentrating on my novel. Thus far, I don't think it's a very good short story, either. If he's going to interrupt me, the least he could do is tempt me with something better.

Before assailing me with new characters, Devlin allowed me an exercise from the book Emotional Structure: Creating the Story Beneath the Plot by Peter Dunne. Though this book is for screenwriters, much of what Dunne has to say applies to novel writing. I thank my writing friends Celine Shinbutsu (Writing from Japan) and Madison Leigh for the referral to this book. (Both of their blogs are on my link list.)

Celine and Madison encouraged me to try the 3 sentence summary exercise from Emotional Structure for The Art of Deception. I did, and this is what I came up with:

One of Rebecca Allyn's art gallery customers has been murdered and homicide detective Erik Thorne put Rebecca's name at the top of his suspect list. But Erik appears to run hot and cold whenever Rebecca sees him, and she has to scramble to prove her innocence while at the same time fighting her attraction to him. When the case against her unveils past wrongs by one of her family members, Rebecca finds out she must rely upon the very man she wants to run from.

Devlin then allowed me an exercise from Plot and Structure by James Scott Bell. Funny how I always return to that book. I highly recommend it to my writerly friends. Emotional Structure is new to me, and I'm sure I will find it quite useful, but Plot and Structure is a book I cannot do without. I applied Bell's "L-O-C-K" method to Deception and ferreted out plot details that needed to be found. I can't post the results of that exercise here as it contains spoilers for the story, but the result of my efforts was a one-page summary.

I'd like to apply both of these exercises to my other novel Falling Short as soon as I finish the taxes. And finish Deception. I'd sure like to have the mystery done before I continue Heidi and Dave's story.

What I find most haunting about my muse is the fact that he insists on being heard when I have little opportunity to follow him. Where is he on those days when I need him? Why does he insist on showing up when I need to concentrate on something other than my writing?

Writing while life is in progress

2008-03-13T21:44:00.000-07:00

In the midst of a hectic time for homeschooling, some sad and happy family events, home remodeling, and tax season, I've hardly had time to think about my writing. I had to make a choice: let go of the story or shirk my responsibility. The writing had to be set aside and eventually I became detached from my story.

Now is when my writing buddies are the salve for my pains. One ruthless friend helped me fill in the holes in my plot. A practical friend mentioned an exercise from a writing book that summarizes your story to help you gain focus. And a brave yet determined friend went through said exercise with her own story at the same time I was doing mine; her encouraging feedback has fueled my determination. I'm still working on the summary (you know it has to be perfect for me to move on), but it's giving me a better foundation for Deception and a desire to use the same exercise for Falling Short. The point is the story is fresh in my mind now. Probably any exercise would have done that, but not any group could have provided that kind of support.

Writing groups and/or writing buddies can be inspiring and supportive, or they can be a drain on your creativity. I'm fortunate to be among the inspiring and supportive. There are numerous writing books available -trust me, I have my own favorites - but when you lose your grip on your story, you need a good slap across the face and a shove in the right direction. Who better to do that than your writing buddies?

In the "Bummer" column: I received the results of a contest I entered, and my story "The Painting" was not among the winners, the finalists, or even the honorable mentions. Ouch. Time to set it aside for a while and think about what is missing from the story.

Onward ho! I have writing students waiting for critiques, homeschooling lessons to plan, airline reservatiosn to make, taxes to file, a variance report to fill out...oh, and a story to write :)

New faces, lots of love

2008-03-10T23:26:00.001-07:00

February is over and I'm rather happy to see it go. 'Nuff with the sadness. March has been very good so far. Alan's memorial made for a wonderful day, one I won't likely forget. The forecast was rain but we had sunshine and fair temps. Lots of love, lots of laughter. And I am blessed with two new arrivals to the family.

First is our new dog, Frederick Von Zack the 27th Junior, otherwise known as Fred E. (Don't ask.) He's a loveable, scruffy, mixed breed 5 year old with good manners and a happy disposition. At times, I find myself thinking of Sadie when he looks at me with all that love and trust. His paw print is already indelibly etched upon all of our hearts.

The second is the birth of my new niece, Berlin Rae, brought into this world by my husband's baby brother and his wife. Berlin is TINY! 6lbs 6oz. We thought she might be born on leap day but she decided to wait until March 3rd. Mom, Dad and baby are all doing well. I'm going to meet Berlin on Tuesday and I can't wait to hold her. Um, and give my brother- and sister-in-law hugs :)

Finally, March has brought the return of Devlin, my muse. Perhaps all he wanted was a name.

Saying goodbye to my brother-in-law

2008-02-28T12:47:00.000-08:00

Alan Wesley Batchelor
August 18, 1958 to February 21, 2008

Alan passed away in his home in Sultan on Thursday, February 21st. He is survived by his wife Kathy, his three adult sons Bryan, Andy (Cyndi), and Brad, his granddaughters Lily and Andrea, his mother Nina, and his sister Diana. He was preceded in death by his father Al. Family members and his many friends will remember Al for his loyalty and his laugh. During their nearly 30 year marriage, Al and Kathy lived in Bellevue, Lynnwood, and recently Sultan, making lifelong friends everywhere they went. Al worked as an automotive technician for many years and as a truck driver for the past 8 years. He was quick to help his friends with their car troubles. Al had a passion for Harleys and billiards, and he adored his granddaughters. A private memorial will be held in his honor on Saturday, March 8th.

Alan, are you riding your "Bagger" in heaven? Playing pool? We sent Yahoo and Zuni up to play with you.

We miss you.

Chop-chop!

2008-02-20T23:11:00.000-08:00

Remember how in touch I was with my story just weeks ago? And how I took a little time off from writing to get my bearings after putting my dog down? Well, my muse has escaped. I've been looking everywhere for him. The most he does these days is linger in that moment between awake and asleep and whisper sweet plot changes in my ear. (To which of course I quickly stumble to the computer and enter on my manuscript. You ought to see my surprise the next day. I've been feeling a bit like the shoemaker.)

Time to take matters into my own hands and show my story - and my muse - that I mean business.

I've printed off the first third of the manuscript and I'm rearranging the scenes until I find the best way to work in the plot changes. You know, the ones my muse has been whispering in my somnambulent ear. Once I determine how to launch the story properly, I'm off to the middles with my motive, method, and opportunity list. I intend to damage to the reputations of my characters. Sully their names. Cast suspicion upon them.

If you should see my muse, please tell him that while I appreciate the insights, I'd prefer he called upon me during normal business hours.

46 ODD Things

2008-02-18T00:59:00.000-08:00

Here’s a fun meme I received via email from Madison Leigh (see my blog list).
50 ODD Things about you! Feel free to copy this to your blog and fill it out or email your answers to a friend. Learn 50 things about your friends, and let them learn 50 things about you!

1. Do you like blue cheese? I used to. Haven’t had it in years. What ever happened to Roquefort?2. Have you ever been rock climbing? Nope. I’m terrified of heights.
3. Do you own a gun? Nope.
4. What flavor do you add to your hush puppies? What the heck is a hush puppy? I thought that was a brand of shoes…
5. Do you get nervous before doctor appointments? After having several surgeries and one life-threatening illness, I don’t fear doctor appointments. Rather, I’ve learned the value of finding a good doctor.
6. What do you think of hot dogs? I don’t think about them. Well, until now. I don’t eat them very often.
7. Favorite Christmas movie? Used to be White Christmas but now I’m not in the holiday mood until I’ve seen Love, Actually.
8. What do you prefer to drink in the morning? Though I had to switch to decaf, I still don’t go without my coffee in the morning.
9. Can you do push ups? The girlie ones.
WHERE’S #10??? Anyone who knows me knows that I’d notice that #10 is missing!!!! Am I supposed to make up my own question? Doesn’t this bother anyone else???
11. What's your favorite piece of jewelry? My wedding ring.
12. Favorite hobby? Writing and reading, if you can call those hobbies. They’re more like life-sustaining activities to me, much like breathing. So maybe I should say crochet…
WHERE’S #13??? Very funny. Someone’s trying to mess with my OCD tendencies.
14. Do you have A.D.D.? Sorry, what was the question? I’m still hung up on the missing #10 and #13.
15. What's one trait you hate about yourself? I’m impatient.
16. What's one trait you like? I'm open and honest.
17. Name 3 thoughts at this exact moment...1. Ghostbusters is on TV again?? 2. Where did I put my cup of tea? 3. I had a thought, but then my daughter asked me something and I forgot what it was.
18. Name 3 things you bought yesterday. What did I do yesterday? Oh, right. I bought nothing yesterday.
19. Name 3 drinks you regularly drink? Decaf coffee, herbal tea, water.
20. Current worry? Just one? LOL! Um, my biggest worry would be my parents’ health.
21. Current hate right now? Hate? I don’t hate many things. I guess I’d have to say mud-slinging politicians (are there any other kind?) and violent crimes, not necessarily in that order.
22. Favorite place to be? Home, though I’m looking forward to my travels this year. Both upcoming trips are important and, although I don’t like to travel, I want to spend time with the people I’m going to be traveling to see.
23. How did you bring in the New Year? First of all, I didn’t bring it anywhere; it arrived without my help. But I did RING it in with my husband, children, and our good friends and their children. It was perfect.
24. Where would you like to go? To the top of the NY Times bestseller list. Guess I better finish those novels I’m writing…
25. Name three people who will complete this? I don’t want to put pressure on anyone.
26. Do you own slippers? Several pairs!
27. What shirt are you wearing? A brown t-shirt, and a dark green fleece pullover. It’s after midnight. How come I’m not in my PJ’s???
28. Do you like sleeping on satin sheets? Blech. Nope, I prefer flannel or the usual cotton.
29. Can you whistle? Yes, but I’ve never been able to do that ear-splitting whistle, you know, the one that can be heard blocks away, and I’ve always wanted to know how to do that.
30. Favorite color? Boy, that’s tough. I love different colors for different situations. I like green. And blue. And that warm, dark, rich brown that’s sometimes called espresso.
31. Would you be a pirate? I’d be afraid of offending someone. And I don’t want to steal anything. I like the rebellious spirit of my romaticized version of pirates, though, like the Johnny Depp kind of pirate.
32. What songs do you sing in the shower? Usually something I just heard on my i-Pod, and my taste in music is so eclectic, that could be anything from Old Blue Eyes to and old Zeppelin song.
33. Favorite girl's name? I can’t choose just a name; I have to know the character behind the name. For that reason, I love so many girls’ names that I can’t list them here.
34. Favorite boy's name? Ditto from #34, but I must say I’m particularly fond of Vern :)
35. What's in your pocket right now? Nothing. I hate having anything in my pockets.
36. Last thing that made you laugh? My son. He misconstrued something he heard on TV and we were both laughing.
37. Best bed sheets as a child? Huh? I don’t remember any sheets that I had. They were always white, I think. I was the youngest of 4 kids and so far as I know, my mom never went out and bought any trendy sheets that had cartoon characters on them or anything. A girl I knew had a pink canopy bed and I thought that was the coolest thing I ever saw.
38. Worst injury you've ever had? Injury…hmmm….do I have to go there? There are so many to choose from LOL! I broke my right wrist twice and my left once or twice (I’m pretty sure I broke both two times); I’ve broken fingers, toes, my nose, and a bone in my foot…but probably the worst was when I got run over by my own ATV. Not only was that humiliating, I couldn’t move for days. Oh, wait! When I was in grade school I had broken ribs. That hurt every time I breathed.
39. Do you love where you live? Yes! I absolutely love the Pacific Northwest.
40. How many TVs do you have in your house? 3, but one has no reception. The kids use it for video games.
41. Who is your loudest friend? Oh, that would have to be a Tilley, for sure.
42. How many dogs do you have? Ouch. This question makes me sad, because I just put my old dog Sadie down. I miss her very much.
43. Does someone have a crush on you? Not that I know of. My husband loves me, but it’s been years since he had a crush on me :)
WHERE’S #44??? I was finally over the missing #10 and #13 and suddenly, there’s no 44!!!
45. What is your favorite book(s)? You’re kidding, right? I can’t choose just one! From classic to contemporary, spanning the genres, there are just too many to name.
46. What is your favorite candy? I like salty snacks, usually. If I want candy, I reach for something chocolate, I guess. My dad gets me these fabulous truffles from a store in Seattle called Chocolati.
47. Favorite Sports Team? Seattle Seahawks! I also like the Seattle Mariners.
48. What song do you want played at your funeral? What kind of morbid question is that? I’d rather the people who knew me and loved me chose a song. I’ll be happy where I’m at; funerals and memorials are for the living.
WHERE’S #49??? This really should be titled 46 ODD Things about me!
50. What was the first thing you thought of when you woke up? I thought about my dog, Sadie. Hey, after 16 years, it’s hard to break the habit of caring for her.

In memory of my sweet Sadie girl

2008-02-05T18:56:00.000-08:00

Today was a difficult day. I had to put down my sweet dog, Sadie. She was a sixteen year old Jack Russell terrier, and for most of her life, she was full of energy. We knew this day was coming; her health had been declining steadily in the last year and worsened over the weekend. I didn't want to see her in pain and I couldn't bear to see her waste away. She stopped barking two years ago, but she still had a full repertoire of vocal sounds. She found a way to communicate with me through little growls and whines. Over the last four days she just looked at me with sad, tired eyes and when I reached out to let her know I was there she simply sighed. Mostly blind and rather deaf, she would howl when I was not in the house. She followed me everywhere and depended on me to lead her where she should go. I think that's what made putting her down so very heartbreaking.

When is it ever easy?

I started missing her the moment she slipped away in my arms.

Results of P&E Poll

2008-01-28T23:06:00.001-08:00

I forgot to mention, the results of the P&E poll are in!

The Heat of the Moment tied for 6th place in the anthology category
Devil's Breath tied for 14th place in the mainstream short story category
Hear the Wind Blow tied for 5th place in the fantasy short story category

Thank you to everyone who voted, and congratulations to all the winners! You can see the complete list at http://critters.org/predpoll/tally.html

Confessions of a writer-in-progress

2008-01-28T22:36:00.001-08:00

I have all these writerly thoughts swimming around my head. Character development. Story arc. Character goals. And every night I go to bed with one particular thought on my mind: Who killed Humbert Watson?

I've written this story once. It didn't work. I'm writing it again and I still don't know who killed Humbert Watson and why.

But I'm okay with that.

This story has evolved. The characters have evolved because I've let them evolve. That doesn't mean that what I'm writing now will end up in the final draft: it means I can explore the possibilities and let the characters lead the way. Sometimes that means I write a scene that has to be tossed. I've got plenty of those! But sometimes I stumble upon the direction the story needs to go, and that's exciting.

It's why I started writing, and why I love the craft.

Judge a Book by the Cover

2008-01-20T22:36:00.000-08:00

My, it's been a while since I last updated my blog. I've been busy with L-I-F-E and whining about not getting enough writing time. I get a few hours here and there but not enough to keep me happy. I sense a day-long writing session coming up. You know, one of those days where I don't even get dressed all day, I just sit at the computer and get lost in my fictional world.

Great news! The cover for my e-book, Hear the Wind Blow, is being featured on Nikki Leigh's blog. http://judgebookbycover.blogspot.com/2008/01/hear-wind-blow-by-janelle-dakota.html Check out Nikki's blog to learn more about her and her book promotion ideas. Thank you, Nikki!

Preditors and Editors: Last time I checked, Hear the Wind Blow was tied for 5th place; Devil's Breath was tied for 14th. The official results will be posted in February. Thank you to everyone who voted! You can see the tally at http://critters.org/predpoll/tally.html and the final results will be posted at http://anotherealm.com/prededitors/perpoll.htm

Blog goals, life goals

2008-01-09T20:33:00.000-08:00

Things I'd like to do with my blog:

Learn how to post book covers on my blog like I can on MySpace so I can have a stack of "tiles" that represents my reading pile or what I've read so far this year.
Learn how to make an active link with html. For instance, have a line that says, "If you want to buy my book, click here" and the words click here are the underlined link. That's cool.
Try having a guest blogger. Preferably one of my favorite authors.
Settle on a bio that reveals my goofy, obsessive, lovable self. I find bios as difficult to write as cover letters. Hopefully, I'll get over that someday soon.
Occasionally post a scene from one of my WIPs. I'm hesitant to do so because of publishing rights. Publishers want the work to be unpublished and to not have been read by more than X amount of people. If portions of it are on the Internet, any number of people could have read it already. I think excerpts must be okay, though, because I see a lot of them on writer blogs. But it feels odd to always talk about my writing on my blog and never share any of it.

This time of year, my thoughts gravitate toward orderliness and organization. Perhaps it's from spending so much time indoors? This year I've taken the orderliness and organization to heart and decided to eliminate activities that drain my energy or rob me of my writing time.

I'll let you know how that works.

Vote for my stories on Predators & Editors!

2008-01-03T21:34:00.000-08:00

My short story, Hear the Wind Blow, has been nominated on Predators and Editors. It only takes a minute to vote. Will you please cast yours?
http://www.critters.org/predpoll/shortstorysf.shtml

And...The Heat of the Moment, the Echelon Press LLC anthology that contains my short story, Devil's Breath.
http://www.critters.org/predpoll/antho.shtml

And finally... my short story, Devil's Breath.
http://www.critters.org/predpoll/shortstory.shtml

All you have to do is follow the links, scroll down (to Hear the Wind Blow, The Heat of the Moment, and Devil's Breath, respectively), enter your name and email address, and click submit. You'll receive a confirmation email and your vote will count once you confirm it. Voting goes from January 1 to midnight, January 15th (GMT).

Your vote is greatly appreciated! Thank you!

Conference update

2008-01-03T21:00:00.000-08:00

I'm officially registered! I'll be going to Massachusetts in April. I'm so excited!!! I've never been to the northeastern states, and I get to meet one of my long-time online writing buddies for the first time. Way cool!

Deception is coming along very well. I have over 8,000 words on this draft so far. But I'm anxious to get back to Falling as soon as possible. I feel guilty, like I'm cheating on my characters. At the very least, I'm neglecting them. How rude of me, especially considering that those particular characters were productive in December, even though I was not :-)

I've really, really enjoyed the break from routine that the holidays provided. So much so that I'm not ready to go back to the normal routine. I thought about kicking and screaming, but I've never been good at tantrums. My daughter has a science class tomorrow and basketball on Saturday, my son goes back to school on Monday, and my daughter's homeschool classes resume on Monday. Our busy week includes a play at the Seattle Children's Theatre (The Neverending Story), piano lessons, orthodontist appointments, and evening meetings. So it wouldn't matter if I had a tantrum, I'd still be thrust back into Life As Usual.

What that last paragraph leads me to believe (she says with dawning realization) is that I need to take a look at how I spend my time and why I dislike my usual routine so much. Duh.

First blog post of 2008

2008-01-02T13:18:00.001-08:00

In between making merry with my friends and family over the past two days, I took down the Christmas decorations, cleaned house, and got busy on The Art of Deception. I also made a few notes on Falling Short which resulted in a minor change that will have a big impact. It's funny how a small change in one character can effect so much. Like looking through binoculars and shifting the view just slightly - a little closer, a little farther away - and suddenly so much more comes into focus. I am excited to be having some "yes!" moments in my writing.

Those of you who are near and dear to me know that I need fistfuls of Starbucks and loads of patience in order to partake in the Great American Pastime known as shopping. I loathe shopping. For myself (when and only when I must do so) I go in with a purpose, grab what I need, and get out. Unless we're talking about a bookstore; then, I can spend hours perusing and it takes superhero-willpower to keep from spending my mortgage payment on the latest releases. My daughter, by some fluke in the gene pool, is a true shopper: she needs to explore every possibility before making a decision. My idea of hell. So yesterday, I had a plan: daughter had a gift card to spend at a store within walking distance of my house. Solution: send her with teenage girl next door, follow along a few minutes later to check on them, and spend the time browsing the aisles of Barnes & Noble! I thanked said teenage girl for having the patience to wait while daughter tried on every article of clothing at Old Navy. It was a win-win situation, especially since I had B&N gift cards to spend.

She spent her gift card, snagging bargains and coming away with a cool sweater, two hip new shirts, and a cozy pair of slippers. I bought only one book: The 2007 Best American Short Stories, edited by Stephen King. And a venti-decaf-nonfat-one pump chocolate-mocha :)

Productive Day

2007-12-30T01:40:00.000-08:00

I wrote today, but not on Falling Short.

Not on a short story, either.

No, of all things, I was besieged by the voice of Rebecca, the character in the murder mystery I got all tangled up in a year and a half ago. The one, you may have heard me mention, that was going to take an act of God to untangle the plot lines. I was writing The Art of Deception when I got frustrated and switched gears last October and started writing Falling Short. Rebecca had a lot to say. Apparently, she wanted me to add to chapter one. So I did.

Now I am working on two novels at the same time.

If I seem a bit off, it's only because my brain is trying to listen to too many characters at once.

Personality Memes

2007-12-29T02:10:00.001-08:00

I saw this on CJ's blog and had to give it a try. Thanks, CJ!

The Recipe For Jane

3 parts Superiority2 parts Vitality1 part Mania
Splash of Happiness
Finish off with an olive

What's" the Recipe for Your Personality?

Me? Superiority? Vitality, Mania and Happiness, yes. Hmm. I'll have to work on that Superiority thing.

December

2007-12-29T01:45:00.001-08:00

Wow, December flew by in a flash! I've been neglecting my blog. Shame on me.

I received my copy of the anthology yesterday and I sat down and read every story. I needed a day of R&R so it arrived at precisely the right time. It felt wonderful to be holding a book in my hands that contained one of MY stories. I read Devil's Breath again, but it didn't feel like reading a story because I'm (obviously) too close to it. It's still too fresh in my writer's mind for me to have any perspective.

On Thursday, I received a very nice rejection letter from Story Quarterly. It's time to put "Not Your Average Joe" aside for a while - let Joe sit until I can look at him objectively and figure out why he didn't win anything more than finalist status in the Lunch Hour Stories contest.

This December, I enjoyed time with family and friends. I didn't hover over my keyboard. My ISP helped: we've had intermittent connectivity problems for months and in December we rarely had any internet access. But stepping away from my story was good for my family, for me, and for my characters. Guess what they did while I was making merry? They GREW! Isn't that amazing? I'm so proud of them. Now they're ready to pounce back onto the page.

Holiday tidings

2007-12-29T01:08:00.000-08:00

I'm a bit late with this but the holidays aren't over yet, right? If you want to participate, copy the questions and delete my answers. It's fun!

1. Wrapping paper or gift bags? Usually wrapping paper.
2. Real or Artificial tree? Artificial (stupid allergies)
3. When do you put up the tree? After my husband brings it in the house.
4. When do you take the tree down? I try to resist taking it down the day after Christmas.
5. Do you like eggnog? Love my eggnog lattes!
6. Favorite gift you received as a child? A doll that was almost as tall as I was. I don't remember her name.
7. Do you have a nativity scene? Yes, it's crystal and beautiful, but it's in storage this year.
8. Hardest person to buy for? My husband.
9. Easiest person to buy for? My kids
10. What was the worst Christmas gift ever received? A stuffed reindeer that sang "Grandma Got Runover By a Reindeer"
11. Christmas Cards? Love them. Used to do them every year. Now I send a New Year's letter.
12. Favorite Christmas movie? White Christmas.
13. When do you start shopping for Christmas? It depends on the year. Once, when I was young and full of energy and enthusiasm, I started on Dec 26th. Most years, we choose a Christmas project by Thanksgiving and start making our gifts.
14. Have you ever 'recycled' a Christmas present? See #10 above. Dunno who has it now, but I imagine it will find its way back to me.
15. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas? My husband's breakfast quiche. Yum!
16. Clear lights or colored on the tree? Colored.
17. Favorite Christmas Song? Oh Holy Night. Martina McBride's version makes me cry.
18. Travel at Christmas or Stay Home? Home.
19. Can you name Santa's Reindeer? Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixin, Comet, Cupid, Donner and Blitzen.
20. Do you have an Angel or a Star on top of your tree? A star that my husband made.
21. Open the Presents Christmas Eve or Morning? In the morning, after Santa's been here.
22. Most annoying thing about this time of the year? I live near a major shopping mall. Getting out to do my errands is stressful between November and January.
23. Shopping...Mall or online? I detest shopping malls and the mass consumerism they represent.
24. Do you decorate outside for Christmas or just inside (or at all?) This year, we barely even got the tree up because all of our stuff is in storage due to the addition we're constructing. But usually we decorate inside and out.
25. Favorite Christmas cookie? Boy, it's tough to choose one. Gingerbread cookies? No; chocolate crinkles? Sorry. Too many choices.
26. Do you own Christmassy clothing or jewelry? Yes, both, but couldn't get to them this year (see answer to #24).
27. Do you believe in Santa? Duh.

Preorder Heat of the Moment

2007-12-10T21:42:00.000-08:00

I know you've all been waiting for the release of the anthology that contains my short story, Devil's Breath. THE HEAT OF THE MOMENT is now available for preorder on Amazon.com. Order your copy today and help support the San Diego County Fire Safety Council and the families who lost so much in the recent wildfires.

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1590805968?tag=myspace08-20&link_code=xm2&camp=2025&dev-t=D2WQY839001DMT

"Devil's Breath" in PRINT!

2007-12-02T23:55:00.000-08:00

My short story "Devil's Breath" will be featured in an anthology titled THE HEAT OF THE MOMENT. The anthology will be available in print! I will post as soon as it's available on Amazon.com.

Your purchase of the anthology will directly benefit the victims of the San Diego wildfires.

With one e-mail sent by publisher Karen Syed to 21 authors, "The Heat of the Moment" was developed. Each of the authors involved in this remarkable collection of short stories, the youngest being sixteen years old, has made a pledge. Contributors, authors, editors, and artist; all have committed their royalties to benefit the survivors of the San Diego fires of 2007.

"The Heat of the Moment" is a compilation of twenty short stories with one common theme—fire. From fantasies to tributes remembering historical catastrophes, chilling and moving, the stories will tap human emotions with their overwhelming credit to survival.

The Fire Safe Council of San Diego County (FSCSDC) was formed in 1997 and is comprised of a 15-member Board of Directors (voting members). The Board consists of federal, state, and local agencies and stakeholders as determined by the FSCSDC. The FSCSDC is a 501(c)3 non-profit organization, is incorporated under the California Franchise Tax Board. The FSCSDC is a member of the California Fire Safe Council, a non-profit corporation, and is authorized to use the name "Fire Safe Council" and the FSC logo. All FSCSDC Council members have common goals of fire safety education and pre-fire management, attend meetings, and participate in SDCFSC programs and activities.

Echelon Press, LLC, is an independent publishing house based in Laurel, MD. With ninety authors in their three divisions, Echelon Press has spent nearly seven years cultivating a stable of authors ranging from beginners to national award winners. Echelon authors are located across America as well as in New Zealand, Australia, Israel, and Canada.

Look for my story, titled "Devil's Breath". It is the story of a struggling blended family that finds a connection in the grasp of raging chaos.

More info:
http://www.myspace.com/heatofthemoment2007
www.echelonpress.com/heat.htm

The Last Day

2007-11-30T22:55:00.001-08:00

I started this month with grand ambitions. I didn't meet my goal. At this stage, I could offer up excuses to myself but I won't because of the most important thing I did this month was make progress. I completed 10 chapters of my novel that need very little editing.

This has been a very full month:

The first week of the month I submitted a short story to an anthology.
Last week I submitted a short story to a contest.
I spent a week with my mom.
We got our long-awaited building permit for the addition to our home (yes, we put the cart before the horse)
and somewhere in there was all that family stuff, like homeschooling lessons, attending classes, Thanksgiving, etc.

My son turns 13 tomorrow. Wow. Allow me to just stop and think about that for a minute....

Yeah, I can't get my mind around that concept, so, moving on...

I'm disappointed that I didn't get to "win" NaNo and cross that 50K finish line, especially having started off with so many words. But I'm also happy that I don't have another 50K+ word story that needs serious editing. NaNo is fun. It's a rush. But I already know I can produce enough words that, fully assembled, resembles a novel. The question is, can I write a novel-length story that will sell? I think I can, and I'm working hard to make Falling Short the best it can be.

Mexico Slideshow

2007-11-25T01:02:00.000-08:00

Long story, but I'll make it short. I made a beautiful slide show in Windows Movie Maker. It wouldn't work on Blogger. But Blogger of course has their own slideshow program, which I used to create the one below.

A note on the photos:
All of these were taken at Haciena Las Moras, about a 30 minute drive inland from Avenida Del Mar in Mazatlan - or Cameron Sabalo - both are roads that run parallel to the beach and most touristas know where they are so I use them for reference. Hacienda Las Moras is an old ranch in the hills, now used solely as a restaurant and hotel. It's far from the beautiful waves but worth the drive.

A few tips to help you navigate the video:

If you would like to turn off the music, simply click on the little volume button.
If you would like to see the pictures without the fade in, click on "View all pictures".
If you would like to see Andrea Bocelli's music video (in Barcelona, I believe), you'll see a link right next to the little photo in the bottom left corner of my slideshow.
If you'd like to buy me tickets, I will gladly go back and take more pictures.

Mexico

2007-11-25T00:39:00.000-08:00

What? It's almost over?

2007-11-24T00:47:00.000-08:00

It was so cold today. Boy was I wishing to be back in Mexico! The hubby and kids and I launched rockets today. Great day for launching except for the fact that it was 35 degrees. It was so cold my extremities were numb for an hour after we got in the nice warm car.

I'm finally hitting stride again on the writing and November is winding to a close.

You know, I was just thinking...

As we've labored over the addition to our home, we've watched a professional developer erect houses in the lot behind us quickly and (for the most part) with great efficiency. Every step of the way, those construction crews have run circles around us and made us feel like our progress was slow. But we have done it ourselves (and with the help of a truly wonderful neighbor). We know that each step of the way, we've built a good, solid house and we've learned a lot.

I think my progress on Falling Short v4 is like that - good, solid characters and plot - and during this past year of working on the story, I've learned a lot, too.

Despite the tendonitis, it feels good to be buried in my story again.

I'll post the slideshow tomorrow. I hope. I still don't know how to get it from my files to the blog...

Word count: 17,351 (I promise I'll try to turn off my inner editor tomorrow)
Conference fund: $189

Hola

2007-11-21T00:59:00.000-08:00

A special note to Mom and her friends:

Thank you for making my week in Mazatlan so enjoyable!

Back home

2007-11-20T23:13:00.000-08:00

After a week in Mexico, reality hit before the wheels of the jet touched down at SeaTac. My word count is depressingly low. In order to hit my initial goal of 80,000 words by November 30th, I need to write 6,400 words per day from here on out. (Insert hysterical laughter.)

I think it's time to redefine my goals.

I started the day wondering why I even thought I should write this novel in the first place. I ended it by recalling the fact that I am a writer and I love these characters.

So what if I didn't get any writing done in Mexico? So what if I'm behind on my NaNo word count? Tomorrow I'm going to dive right back in.

Tonight, my nine year old daughter is teaching me how to make a slideshow of my Mexico pics to post on my blog.

Middles

2007-11-07T23:58:00.000-08:00

Conference Fund: $165

House: a total disaster. I struggled to keep up with homeschooling, errands, music lessons, writing...so the house suffers. My loving husband picked up dinner, bless his heart.

NaNo Word Count: 15,811

Not spectacular progress, but I worked on a short story submission today as well. It seemed to take me all day to write a dedication and a bio, and make a few small (we're talking one word here and there) changes to the short story. The story has been submitted. I'm done. Woohoo!

The slow progress on NaNo isn't bothering me too much. I like the structure of what I have so far, which cannot be said for previous years and the blustering cacophony of words that poured forth. I've been keeping a chapter outline as I write - about a paragraph describing each chapter. I think the next order of business will be reviewing that outline and deciding what needs to be set up next or if I've missed setting something up. It's important for me to weave in all the threads of the story within the first 20,000 words or so. That way I won't run into any of those, "oops, shoulda mentioned that sooner" kind of surprises in the busy, bulky middle.

I love and hate writing the middle chapters, so I approach this 4th rewrite with a small amount of trepidation. The middle is the best part of a novel (who doesn't love being in the middle of a thoroughly engrossing read?) and it can be so much fun to write, but it's also tricky and sometimes exasperating. In my first completed novel, Among Friends, the middle was confusing and muddled. In my second, not-completed novel, The Art of Deception, I seem to have lost a few threads along the way. I never got to the end because I simply got lost in the plot.

So this middle, which I have written three times so far, should be a piece of cake, right? What I noticed from my last version is that it's too easy for me, as a writer, to interfere and manipulate when I know what's coming next, but as a reader, I hate it when I notice the author manipulating the characters. It kills the momentum of the story. This time, I have to find balance: rising conflict, continuing story goal, and a reason for the reader to actually care what's going to happen.

I might spend a bit of time tomorrow reviewing character goals and story goals, too.

Can you tell I suddenly have mixed feelings? I started this post off saying I was feeling good about my progress, and now I'm thinking I should re-examine the entire concept of the story. Argh! I love writing. Really, I do.

I'm J Latta

2007-11-07T01:03:00.000-08:00

Phantom Squirrel reminded me of this. In case anyone wants to find me on the NaNo site, my NaNo ID is J Latta.

Conference Fund: $160

Word count: 15,060

I've finished the short story I was working on. Did I mention it's titled "Devil's Breath"? Readers who live in Southern California will understand the reference in the title. I'm not shopping this one around because it's already spoken for. I will post publication specifics when I know them.

Day - what? Oh yeah. 6

2007-11-06T16:38:00.000-08:00

The days and nights have lost distinction, one from the other. Sleep happens whenever I can't keep my eyes open. I put food in my mouth when my stomach growls. I think I took a shower yesterday. The dirty clothes are spilling out of the laundry hamper. And my family has to go to great measures to get my attention.

Yep, it's definitely NaNoWriMo.

I'm getting sick of keeping track of how many words I have for NaNo versus how many on my novel, so I'm just going to go with my overall number. Cheating? Only if winning NaNo is my goal, which it is not. Finishing the novel is my goal. And right now, I'm feeling good about the story. I had to drop the first person POV (one of my multiples) because it wasn't working with the rest. But that's okay. It led me to the multiple third, which is working very well. I left off yesterday in mid-action, which is one of the oldest tricks in the book to keep the writer motivated. Funny how those old tricks work so well. Why are there so many writing books that try to reinvent the wheel?

Though my word count is low, I am significantly pleased with the progress I've made so far. My words should begin piling up from this point, now that I have the pacing and structure I want.

Back to it. I'll post my word count at the end of the day.

Day Three

2007-11-04T01:40:00.000-07:00

I finally surpassed the 10,000 word mark on the rewrite of Falling Short. 10,000 words isn't a big deal since I started NaNo with 8900 words, but the way my November has gone so far, it's a milestone worth noting.

My word count is now 11,234 making my NaNo tally 2,334. Lame, considering I should have over 7,000 by now, but at this point I'm happy to have forward progress.

And the story! I'm pleased to say that it's surprised me already. Remember the narrator idea? I changed it slightly. And it's working! Multiple POV isn't gimmicky, new, or trendy. (Multiple POV is where the author shows a different character viewpoint each chapter - the multiple referring to more than two character viewpoints - and so far I have 5.) It's been used a lot for a reason. Yes, I know it will drive some people batty, but it's brought the characters, and the story, to life.

I also made notes today on a few changes to the short story I recently finished, the one I titled "Devil's Breath."

Hoping to bring my word count close to 15,000 tomorrow.

Day One

2007-11-01T22:15:00.000-07:00

In years past, I have produced some stellar first day word counts.

Not this year.

I spent 7 hours on the telephone with various IT support techs who helped me sort out why I had no internet signal (stupid IP addresses), why my wireless print router wouldn't communicate with the new modem/router (IP addresses that don't like other IP addresses), then why my laptop wouldn't communicate with the printer router, etc (let's all cheer for Windows Vista!). It was a nightmare, and the last thing I want to do tonight is sit at my computer and write.

My "zero" for NaNo is not the 10,000 as I had hoped before I dumped coffee on my laptop and lost 800 or so words. As of 12:01 am November 1st, I had 8900 words written on Falling Short v4. So that will be my zero. The NaNo norm is to try to write at least 1667 words per day. My personal goal is 80,000 by Nov 30th, so that means I need to write 2370 per day, and if I don't write that many today, I'll have more to do tomorrow.

I'm setting the timer for 30 minutes and I'm going to write like mad.

* * * * *

Well, that did not go well at all. My word count is 369 for the evening's work. Phooey.

I have a lot of words to write tomorrow!

November = NaNoWriMo

2007-10-31T23:21:00.000-07:00

It's NaNoWriMo time again! 30 days of writing until my eyelids feel like sandpaper, my butt goes numb, my fingers cramp up, my back and neck ache, and my family wears dirty underwear. (I swear, no amount of laundry piled in the halls will compel any member of this household besides myself to run a load. They'd as soon wear stinky clothes than wash and fold.)

Of course, I'm going into National Novel Writing Month with a backlog of work to be done on a handful of short stories. What else is new? I have this insane optimism that I'll be able to fire off my NaNo daily word quota and then spend the rest of the day polishing my short stories. Please don't burst my bubble. I'm a professional writer, after all. I work best when I'm up against a deadline.

Quit laughing, Mel.

Okay, so now that Happy, Too and I are acquainted, I have had a quarrel with my ISP. I am going public with my rant. VERIZON DSL SUCKS! How's that for eloquence in writing? The basic problem is that my Internet access is spotty. My husband has threatened to go broadband and I've been encouraging him to follow through on his threat. Really, Verizon has done nothing to help. They refuse to send out a technician to check the service, although my IT-wise friend said that is the problem. Verizon says I don't have a Verizon-approved modem/router and therefore they swear it isn't configured properly. I don't know enough about IT to argue properly, but it would seem to me that if the modem/router combo was at fault, it wouldn't work at all, would it? They claim it doesn't have the right setting in order to communicate with Verizon. So why does it communicate sometimes and not others?

And these machines are supposed to make our lives easier!

On the positive, compared to computer problems, writing a story is easy.

Oops

2007-10-26T22:49:00.000-07:00

This morning I tossed a cup of coffee onto my new laptop. It immediately shut down and no amount of CPR from the Geek Squad would bring it back to life. It happened so quickly, but there was a moment that, in retropsect, seemed suspended in mid-motion, like a stop-action television commercial: The telephone rings, my hand reaches for it, the coffee tips. If only I could have that moment back! Thankfully, I invested in a protection plan which, evidently, guards against stupidity. I have a new laptop just like the old. My daughter and I christened (sorry, yes, the pun was intended) the ruined laptop as he went off to the computer graveyard. His name was Happy. I am writing to you now from Happy Too.

Besides Happy and my pride, I lost all my emails and the writing I did on Wednesday. The rest of my documents are scattered about on thumb drives. If I had saved Wednesdays work.... Ah, well, no use crying over spilt coffee.

Word count, narrators, NaNo, friends

2007-10-24T22:57:00.001-07:00

Final word count of the day: 9314

I think my last word count was around 8500. So it wasn't a great day, but not a bad day, either. To be writing at all felt like a major accomplishment, but once I got rolling, it was easy and fun. I'm still toying with the narrator and the tone and pacing of the opening chapters. By NaNo in November, I should have at least 10,000 words. Assuming the 10,000, my NaNo goal would then become 60,000 in order to make the 50,000 word minimum. However, I hope to have 80,000 words by the end of November, the last two being The End.

Haven't worked on The Painting in a while and I'm okay with that. I'm letting the feedback settle in around me, digesting it, deciding what I want to do with the story. I respect the feedback I receive and like to give it the deliberation it deserves, even if I don't always use it.

I had one of those long talks last night with a friend I've known practically my entire life. We haven't actually seen each other in years, but lately we've had reason to talk on the phone a few times a month. Our spirits are connected (seriously - I'm not kidding) so we can chat comfortably any time at all, even if it's been months since we last talked. But I'd really like to make the time to see her soon. Ellie helps me see myself. I don't know why, but she does. Sometimes I miss my horse days because we were together often - riding, sharing tack, having a beer after a hot day at the stables. Funny thing is, our relationship has been seasoned by experiences, both mutual and individual, and yet here we are, still connecting through it all.

Just thought I'd share that.

A modern writer's lifeline

2007-10-21T21:45:00.000-07:00

A bit of an absence there. Sorry.

Remember the troubles I'd had on my laptop? They got worse. I got the blue screen of death - more than once - and my confidence in its ability to retain what I'd written was shaken. Modern writers depend upon computers. And thumbdrives. And notebooks filled with random thoughts. But it was simply unforgiveable for my laptop to let me down that way.

After the breakup with my Dell, I found new love with this zippy little HP. We're getting better acquainted (read: Vista is a new experience) and I must say that all my files look so sparklingly new here! It's rather inspiring.

I haven't written one word on my novel in almost two weeks and now I'm eager to get back to it. I actually had a dream about my characters last night. Get this: they were in my house! Dogsitting of all things! It was a clear sign that I need to get back to writing. Or that I need to arrange for care for my old Sadie-dog while I'm away to see my mother in November.

Scattergories

2007-10-07T13:06:00.000-07:00

SCATTERGORIES... it's harder than it looks!
*Use the 1st letter of your name to answer each of the following...
*They have to be real places, names, things, nothing made up!
*Try to use different answers if the person in front of you had the same 1st initial.
*You CAN'T use your name for the boy/girl name question

What is your name? Jane
4 letter word: Joke
Vehicle: Jaguar
City: Jacksonville
Boy name: John
Girl Name: Jennifer
Alcoholic drink: Julip
Occupation: Job Cost Analyzer
Something you wear : Jeans
Celebrity: J-Lo
Food: Jelly beans
Reason for Being Late: Just being me :) Okay, okay...jack-knifed
Cartoon Character: Jerry (of Tom and)

Narrators and characters

2007-10-07T00:54:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, I played with the idea of adding a narrator to my story. Actually, the voice and the words came to me late the night before last. I jotted them down in the notebook I keep beside the bed and now the narrator won't shut up. This narrator, by the way, is talking to another character about the story. So if you ask me a question and I don't answer right away, it's probably because I'm trying to listen to three people at once.

Here's what I found out through my "play" time:

I didn't know enough about this secondary character who wants to do the narrating.
I'm distanced from this character for personal reasons and there's just no room for that in novel writing.
The narrator wants the reader to discover his/her identity. In other words, I'm not supposed to say who it is. Wants you to believe it's for modesty's sake, but it isn't. This character can be dramatic and self-centered.
Making a seamless transition from narrator to story isn't as easy as you'd think, especially when said character is in the story and doesn't want to say "I" in the scenes pertaining to him/her.
The narrator sets the tone of the entire novel.
I don't like fiction gimmicks, so where did this one come from?

My official word count remains the same since these words are not on the manuscript yet. I haven't determined if the narrator stays or if I'm just using an unconventional method to find out more about the character.

Beyond the narrator thing, I had some fun: I cut out pictures from catalogues and magazines that reminded me of my characters. So far, I have Heidi, Dave, Scott, Lynette, and Kirsten. I have a *maybe* on Sophie and a tiny picture of Cortanie. I'd still like pictures for Brady and Bill, Grandpa, Cecelia, Claudia, John and Suze, and some of the minor characters like Sunflower and Rich. Unfortunately, catalogues and magazines aren't ideal places to find your characters' faces. I don't envision models when I'm writing a story.

I also read through a good bit of the last manuscript and while there are some entertaining and well-written scenes, it reads like a warm-up to the story I'm writing now. It's like I have this 300 page outline, much of which is background information and side notes.

A Good Day

2007-10-03T23:31:00.000-07:00

Final word count of the day: 8528

I just had an awesome, productive writing day. I copied parts of several of Dave's scenes from the previous draft and had a blast making the changes and turning them into one chapter. It wasn't a lot of writing, but it took some creativity and I snuck in some writing when I got the characters to open up a bit more. I really like writing Dave's POV. Plus, I went back (yes, again) and made some changes to a few scenes with Heidi.

I also went for a good, long walk today, enough to be feeling it now. Homeschooling lessons with my daughter were rather fun. My son was selected as one of the 10 students in his school to be on the Lego Robotics team - something he really wanted to do. I tried a new recipe. Had dinner on the table earlier than usual. AND the family gobbled it up, evidence that it was pretty good.

All in all, a pretty darn good day. That I got one load of laundry done on top of all that other great stuff was just icing on the cake.

Word Count v4

2007-10-03T00:01:00.000-07:00

New word count at the end of today:

4557

I've dubbed this version of Falling Short "v4" until I make a decision on the title.

A productive detour

2007-10-02T13:54:00.000-07:00

I worked on the 500-word version of "The Painting" yesterday. What I found the most challenging was retaining the story, keeping the descriptive element, and providing tension, all within the 500 word constriction. I hope I've told a story beyond the words on the page. We'll see. Now it has to sit for a while before I do anything else with it, plus I'm awaiting feedback from my WIP group.

Goal for today since I spent yesterday working on a short story: 1500 words. I'll come back later to report my progress.

***

I did not meet my goal. I actually slid further behind because I edited the first three chapters. I rearranged a bit, deleted a paragraph or two, and wow! Did that make a difference. Now I'm ready to move on with confidence.

So I came up with a fantasy writing routine:

3-4 days novel writing
1-2 days short story writing/review/revision
1 day novel review and revise (previous 3-4 days' worth)
3-4 days novel writing
1-2 days short story writing/review/revision
1 day novel review and revise, etc.

That sounds like a perfect schedule to me. I wonder if I can make that work, even if only for a little while.

Step by Step

2007-09-29T19:49:00.001-07:00

What to leave in, what to leave out...

Some parts of my novel are staying the same from the previous draft, but a lot is changing. Therefore, I have decided to do a complete rewrite and only copy over the scenes that work in this final revision. What's nice is having a blank slate to work with. What isn't nice is saying goodbye to the 73,000+ words I already wrote. Plus the over 100,000 words in the first two drafts (combined).

I suppose I resisted a complete rewrite because I was already on my third draft. And I asked myself, before starting a fourth draft, why I thought rewriting would be any easier than revising what I had. I couldn't come up with an answer, so I did what all writers do: I just started writing.

With any luck, I'm learning from this process and when I get back to the other two novels I've written, I'll be able to rewrite those with confidence, right?

Word count of Falling Short, take 4:
4795

NaNoWriMo

2007-09-28T17:51:00.002-07:00

Best Stressed Woman
Internet Affair
Falling Short

Whatever I end up calling it, I'm going to be calling it finished by the end of 2007. Instead of waiting for NaNo, I'm starting right now. What if we're back to working full-tilt on the home addition by November? The timing is right. I have to strike while the story is rewriting itself in my head.

Word count today: 945

My goal is to write 1,000 words per day, give or take. At that rate, it will take me 75 days to complete my novel. A writing friend of mine made that her goal, and she had sound logic. Anything over 1,000, she said, and she started wandering aimlessly away from the plot. I've had some awesome 5,000 word days. I've loved those days. I've even written a few good scenes on those days. But without the word-count desperation of NaNo, I'm free to have 5,000 word days only when the story is coming down fast and furious.

30 Minutes

2007-09-25T22:38:00.000-07:00

I am determined to get at least 500 words written in the next half hour. My characters have been hounding me for days. I can't seem to shut them up! In an ordinary world, I'd be locked up for saying that. In the world of writers, it's a good thing.

Saving draft of blog until I'm done with my half hour.... time, 2:36PM.

I'm back. It's 3:06PM and I reached 432 words. Not quite my goal, but it feels so good to be working on Falling Short again. I used to like these characters. Now I love them.

Off to take the kids to piano lessons, then it will be time to cook dinner. Maybe later tonight I'll get a chance to write a bit more.

I did! I was able to write at piano and then this evening and I ended up at over 1o00 words for the day. AND I finished chapter 1 which was all new material. I finally figured out where this story should start, which means I'll be revising much of the 73,000 words I already have, but that's okay. This is my third time through, I think. After this revision, I'll pass it by a trusted friend or two for feedback.

I started this novel in October of 2006. I outlined using Karen Wiesner's First Draft in 30 Days. It was my NaNo novel and it used to be titled Best Stressed Woman. Wow. It's come a long way in one short year.

No writing today. Or yesterday.

2007-09-20T23:12:00.000-07:00

The water pump on my van broke yesterday, which caused the car to run out of water and overheat. Thankfully, it happened close enough to home that I didn't burn up the engine. While I was contacting my mechanic, I spent 4 hours on the phone with my ISP and the manufacturer of my wireless router because we couldn't get online. According to said personnel, both our modem AND our router quit working! Limped the van over to the mechanic and while my van was being fixed, I borrowed my mechanic's car and bought a new router/modem combo, which was hard to find because I'm on DSL, not broadband. Over $100 at Best Buy, but hey, it's Internet access we're talking about here.

The new router/modem would have fixed the problem. If my keyboard for the desktop hadn't chosen that moment to die. To further aggravate matters, my debit card was declined because the equipment rental company charged me for equipment that we still have in use for our remodel and, not being able to go online, I wasn't able to transfer funds to cover it.

As soon as my son was off to school this morning, I went to Staples and bought a new keyboard and saw that the price on the router/modem combo was $20 less. I hadn't even opened the box from Best Buy yet. Plus, with my contract discount through my husband's business, I was able to buy a cordless keyboard PLUS the router/modem for $10 more than I bought just the router/modem at Best Buy. Cool beans, right?

I got it all hooked up. It worked great. Got my funds transfer done. Problem solved. Or so you would think.

And then I noticed the router/modem from Staples wasn't wireless. Grrrrr!

Got the router/modem switched out with the wireless one, then spent all day on the phone with the router manufacturer, my ISP, and the print server manufacturer. Returned the non-wireless router to Staples. Everything is up and running, but the signal is weak on the wireless, rendering it practically useless.

Comcast, here we come.

Heidi and Dave

2007-09-19T00:12:00.000-07:00

I spent a little while with my characters today. I only got 500 words written, but it felt good to be working with them again. Curiously, what I wrote longhand is not what ended up being typed in. I edited as I copied it over. It just didn't sound like the right narrator for Heidi and Dave. I think my editing got me closer, though. I know a lot of writers think editing while writing is taboo, but often I find that if I don't have the right voice, my inner editor actually blocks my path. I can't go on until I figure out what's wrong.

Heidi's loosened up a bit in the time I've been away. I think that will be good for the novel. She's more approachable.

Very, very short stories

2007-09-17T18:19:00.000-07:00

Wow. I have renewed respect for writers of flash fiction. It's difficult to tell a complete story in 500 words or less. A beginning, a middle, and an end within the boundaries of an estimated 166.67 words per section. Without sounding choppy or abbreviated.

Since I love to read flash fiction, I thought I'd try it. I trimmed "The Painting" yesterday. At 1200 words, it seemed short to this writer who loves to indulge in a good, long chapter. But an interesting thing happened when I was trimming: I had to weigh every sentence against the major dramatic question. Yep, back to the basics.

I wrote "The Painting" from a contest prompt, so my first step was to eliminate the prompt but retain the story. It's amazing what happens when you get caught up in following a prompt. My next step was to dissect every sentence for the following:

Usefulness in moving the story forward
Mood
Aesthetics (how the words look, visually, on the page, and how it sounds to my ear)
Characterization. To me, a story is nothing without a strong character to pull me in.

Now I'm ready for the ultimate test: run it by a few brutally honest friends.

Not Your Average Joe

2007-09-14T17:40:00.000-07:00

Joe didn't win the Lunch Hour Stories 2007 short story contest, but it was mentioned.

http://www.lunchhourstories.com/contest_winners.html

Of course, now I'm wondering a few things, such as how many entries there were. 10? :) (Hey, I'm being honest. My immediate reaction was to count the honorable mentions and notice "Joe" was at the bottom of the list.) Do I email the editor at Lunch Hour Stories and ask them to use my pseudonym on the website or just leave it? I'm free to send "Joe" elsewhere. So does it even matter that they used the wrong name?

The Dakota Family?

2007-09-13T20:46:00.000-07:00

Most of you know my real name isn't Janelle Dakota. That's my pseudonym. But it's so much fun to have an online persona. Freedom! I can be Janelle, the author! I can indulge in my first love: writing.

But the majority of my heart belongs to my family: My husband of almost 19 years, my 12 year old son, my 9 year old daughter, and my old dog, Sadie. Of course, what person doesn't have extended family and the obligations therewith? And let's not forget to add homeschooling to the Dakota family recipe and the addition we're building on our house. All in all, I have the usual amount of distractions that any writer has to attend to.

My children love to write. They love to read. What more could a writing mom desire, besides a little writing time of her own? I am thrilled whenever I see my kids catch the writing buzz and really get into their stories. My children and I often read the same books and the discussions we have are enlightening for me as a writer.

But this year, I am missing my son. He started 7th grade at the local school. I know he is well-prepared and a great student (Honors! Proud Mom moment!) and my daughter and I are enjoying the one-on-one time, but...I miss homeschooling my son.

Lyrics

2007-09-06T20:46:00.001-07:00

Where has the time gone? While I've been busy with renovations to the house, bloggers have been running circles around me. I can't possibly bore you with the details of my life since my last blog, so instead I'll offer up an exposition.

Music. Have you ever taken music lessons? My son is taking piano and my daughter is taking flute and piano. Weekly lessons, new songs, practice, practice, practice, right? I have never taken lessons for a musical instrument, but in my youth, I sang. I had voice class every weekday morning from the 4th grade to the 12th, vocal competitions, concerts, music camp, performances, even road trips with the jazz choir. As with playing an instrument, to achieve optimum performance, I had to practice daily. I had to warm up. I had to run through all the songs I was learning. I had to practice each song until I got it right. I had to work at it.

Why is it we writers expect to write a novel without daily practice? Shouldn't we warm up our instrument? Run through the scales, so to speak? But we don't: we sit down at the computer or with our pad and pen and expect an optimum performance of ourselves. We expect that if we start writing the lyrics, we'll find a song.

Just a thought.

Four of my...

2007-08-08T13:57:00.000-07:00

Four places I have worked during my life:
1. Sears gas station, as an attendant.
2. Wendy's: first, in the restaurant, and later as a payroll clerk in the main office.
3. My illustrious accounting career where my jobs ranged from G/L entry to internal auditing.
4. Real estate sales.

Four places I have lived during my life:
1. Bellevue, WA
2. Redmond, WA
3. Bothell, WA
4. Lynnwood, WA (I don't get around much)

Four TV shows I like to watch:
1. Um...I don't watch too much TV. I can't think of one TV show I'd be sad to miss.

Four Vacationed Places:
1. Lincoln City, OR
2. Mazatlan, Mexico (to visit my mom)
3. Las Vegas, NV
4. Orlando, FL

Four of my favorite foods:
1. Does espresso count?
2. Buttered popcorn - yum!
3. Tortilla chips and FRESH salsa. Homemade, of course.
4. Anything with cheese on it.

Four places where I would rather be right now:
1. Signing a contract with a publisher
2. Sitting in my FINISHED house addition
3. On a romantic weekend away with my husband
4. At the beach, watching the kids play while I read a good book

Four friends or relatives I think will respond:
1. Anyone who feels like procrastinating

Four things I'd like to do:
1. See answers to "Four places I'd rather be"
2. Finish writing all 3 of my novels
3. Get over my irrational fears (heights, flying, large crowds, and all those fears that go hand-in-hand with being a mom)
4. Um...can't think of anything else. I'm basically pretty happy.

Now, IF YOU FEEL LIKE PARTICIPATING, here's what you're supposed to do...Copy and paste this to a new email, delete my answers, and type in your own. Then send this to a whole bunch of people you know INCLUDING the person who sent it to you. The theory is that you will learn a lot of little known facts about those who know you.

House vs. Muse

2007-07-19T23:25:00.000-07:00

Two months into the remodel and my excitement for the project is dwindling rapidly. I'm distracted, tense, sore, and I can't seem to sleep through the night. I think it's a classic case of a woman who likes a tidy house but is forced to live in chaos.

After discovering that I cannot attend to writing and remodeling simultaneously, I sent my characters, Heidi and Dave, on vacation. I occasionally hear snippets of scenes from them in the wee hours when I'm teetering between awake and asleep. It's then that I wish I had a method for capturing thoughts because by the time I get to pad and pen the snippets are gone. Anyone know where I can get my hands on a brain recorder? REM transcriptionist? Sleep slate?

Meanwhile, back to the remodel. I finally chose windows only to find out that my husband disagrees with my choices on window placement. Fine time to tell me. More than one friend has commented that a certain percentage of remodels ends in divorce. No kidding. I love my husband very much, but I wish he'd voiced his opinion some earlier time during the two weeks I spent trying to decide on what windows to buy and exactly where I wanted them.

I need to find a way to relax and enjoy the home makeover experience. We have this wonderful neighbor who comes over every day and works on the remodel. Seriously, he is a nice guy who enjoys the work and wants to help out. There's no way we could do this without his assitance. My husband isn't an outgoing person, so it's been interesting to watch as he and the neighbor form a friendship. My husband's younger brother has come over a few times to help, too, especially when there has been heavy work. I pitch in where/when I can, but a lot of the heavier work falls to the guys, thanks to my health issues. All in all, I have a lot to enjoy. Friends, family, progress...and let's not forget the (eventual) end result. If anyone has remedies for the stress that goes along with remodeling, clue me in, because I'd rather not wallow in tension!

And no, I am not going to write a story in which my characters are remodeling. Nuh-uh. No way. There is no drama in waiting for a sales associate at the home improvement warehouse to answer your questions about galvanized nails.

Blog for all ages

2007-07-16T23:07:00.000-07:00

My site is rated G! Thanks to http://elysabethsstories.blogspot.com/ for the idea and her friend http://justlikethenut.blogspot.com/ for the link.

Mingle²

Point of View

2007-06-28T19:34:00.000-07:00

What's your favorite viewpoint as a reader? Do you prefer first person ("My knees shook as I stood to ask the group a question") or third ("Janelle tried to hide her nervousness when she stood to ask the group a question")?

I prefer to write in third, but for some stories - no, some characters - first is the only way to capture the voice. This presents a challenge to me as a writer; I am limited in how much I can show the reader about what is going on with other characters. Alternating first person viewpoints can be done, but I've only read a handful of books with an alternating first where the author employed the technique well. One such example was a novella where the chapters alternated between the husband and the wife from a first person perspective.

No matter if it's in first or third, nothing frustrates me more as a reader than when an author alternates viewpoint and goes back to show me events I've already read about but from a different character's perspective. It's fine if the author moves the story along and reveals the different perspective of past events in context of the story as it progresses, but please don't backtrack!

I suppose these are the reasons why my favorite point of view to write from, and to read from, is third. Sure, third doesn't allow the reader/writer to get as close to the character as first, but it allows the author to move around, zoom in, zoom out, and even alternate characters without jarring the reader.

But first person sure can be fun to write!

What Movie Is Your Love Life Like?

2007-06-18T23:09:00.000-07:00

Your Love Life is Like Pretty Woman

"I want the fairy tale"

You believe that love is truly blind, unpredictable, and surprising. Two very different people can easily find true love. (Yes, my marriage is proof of that.)
At least, that is how it will happen when you marry a gorgeous billionaire someday ;-)
(My husband will be sad to hear that!)
Your love style: Sensual and flirty

Your Hollywood Ending Will Be: Surprisingly happy

(Click the following link to try it yourself)

What Movie Is Your Love Life Like?

Meme tag

2007-06-18T12:58:00.000-07:00

Elysabeth Eldering from http://elysabethsstories.blogspot.com/ has tagged me for my blog's first ever meme!

The ground rules: Each player lists 8 facts/habits about themselves. The rules of the game are posted at the beginning before those facts/habits are listed. At the end of the post, the player then tags 8 people and posts their names, then goes to their blogs and leaves them a comment, letting them know that they have been tagged and asking them to read your blog.

I was told to come up with facts about me that aren't widely known. Here goes:

My biggest regret: that I didn't do anything with my singing. From 4th grade to 12th, I participated in vocal competitions, attended an exclusive music camp, performed countless solos, and gave voice lessons to younger children. I sing in the car now and with the kids, but that's about it. Singing is my number one way to feel good on a down day. I miss it.

I wish my family - my parents in particular - had attended more of my singing performances. It's one part of the mosaic of my life that is so very solitary.

My career before having kids was assistant comptroller, and I loved to chase down errors and perform accuracy audits. Currently, I enjoy helping others gain control over finances by writing budgets for them or giving them advice on how to live well on less income. Some people would say I'm slightly obsessive about orderliness. I think the exacting habits (everything balanced and accounted for) that I learned early in my career have stayed with me. I can't stand to go to bed with dishes in the sink; I like things arranged a certain way; uneven lines bother me on an unhealthy level, to the point that I'll not be able to do anything else until I correct them (like I have to fix a crooked picture on the wall no matter who's house I'm in); I can live with clutter so long as I feel it's controlled clutter; I can't think clearly when I feel like I don't have control over my environment. It's just a quirk about me that most people don't notice.

I married a racecar driver. He's retired now, but the restless spirit is still in his blood.

One of the most rewarding experiences of my life has been homeschooling my son (12) and daughter (9). My son will be attending public school this fall for the first time in his life.

My husband is my best friend. He's my split-apart, the voice in my head when I'm alone, and as vital to me as the air I breathe.

I was born with adrenal insufficiency, and spent the first 6 months of my life mainly in the hospital. At 6 months of age, my adrenals decided to wake up and work. Then on my 40th birthday my adrenals began to fail again, only we didn't know that's what was happening. I spent my 41st birthday in the hospital. The last two years have been a roller-coaster ride of doctors, tests, and medications.

I miss my grandmother, Bernice Dorothy Hackett Green, lovingly known to all as Bunny. She died on Christmas Day, 24 days after the birth of my first child. Twelve years later, I still wish I could visit with her. She would invite her grandchildren over for afternoon tea, so we all have fond memories of tea with Gramma. Each year on her birthday at the end of February, rain or shine, my sisters and I, and occasionally my brother, meet at her gravesite to have tea with Gramma. We pour a cup for her and set it on her grave marker. Gramma could whistle a bird's song, do a Tarzan yell, painted in oils (though she had lost most of her sight to glaucoma), and when she read to me, she used a different voice for each character. Gramma remains the most influential person of my childhood.

Now I'm supposed to say who I'm going to tag. How very sad that I can't think of 8 people with blogs. Well, I know lots of people with blogs but they don't know me! Let's see, I can tag Melanie, Ellie, JC, Beth. Hmm. Does it have to be a blogger? I haven't come up with 8 yet....

The Things People Do

2007-06-14T01:11:00.000-07:00

The story below is something I've been meaning to post from my pre-blog days. The kids and I talk about this story often. The lesson we learned that day was so valuable! Just today, when I found an open, shady parking spot, my daughter said, "I want that spot!" So, guess what? We left it for someone who needed it more than we did.

September 2006

Thought I'd share a recent experience. The kids and I were out on errands one day last week. It was fairly hot and we were hungry so we stopped at a deli for sandwiches. I drove the van to the far side of a parking lot - far away from the department stores and shops - and parked in the shade of the small trees lining the lot. All the parking spots along there were available because no one wanted to walk that far, in the heat, to the store and back. So I parked sideways, taking up 3 spots with my minivan, to make the best use of the shade. As I said, all the spots were open. There were at least 20 shady spots surrounding me, and a dozen more about 30 yards away across a median. We took out our sandwiches, rolled down the windows, and tried to enjoy a few minutes in our busy day. It wasn't an ideal place to eat lunch because we were parallel to a busy street, but you take what you can get, ya know?

A woman pulled up in a blue sedan and started honking. I mean, Toot-toot! Toot-toot! Toot-toot! My son looked out his open window and the lady said, "I want that spot."

I looked around, ahead of me, behind me - there was no one there. Not one car. All the spots were open and available. A car came along behind the blue sedan, went around, and then came back to park, crookedly, about ten slots behind me. I could see she was there to talk on her cell phone, drink her iced coffee, and smoke a cigarette.

The lady in the blue sedan was still there. She LAID on the horn. "Move your car!" she shouted.

I started looking for a sign that said Employee Parking Only or something to indicate that I had committed a violation. I had a deli sandwich on my lap - a messy veggie sandwich with avocado - and I had the driver's seat pushed back. Whatever the inconvenience, I thought I should move the van because obviously there was a reason. Why else would the lady be so upset? So I started the car and very carefully pulled forward far enough so that I was occupying 3 different stalls. This gave her room to pull in behind me.

She followed me and laid on the horn again.

I said to my children, "What? I thought she said she wanted that spot?"

My son said she was waving at me to pull forward. So I did. And she pulled forward. So I backed up, thinking maybe I had the wrong spot or something. The whole time I'm thinking, Why can't she take one of these other spots? Why am I moving around like this, when she could have any one of these? Where the heck does she want me to go?! There were at least 20 spots available and we played this twisted game of tag for a few minutes. I looked around thinking maybe she was meeting someone, but no, there was just that one car further down: Smoking Woman on the cell phone. If Blue Sedan was meeting Smoking Woman, then she'd pull closer to the other car, right? And no one was standing in the parking lot or on the sidewalk waiting, there wasn't a bus stop...nothing! So I pulled forward again and put the car in park and said to heck with it. She'd just have to deal.

I shut the car off and started eating my sandwich again. The lady revved the engine and pulled right up to my back bumper but didn't hit me. Next, she threw her car in revers and sped backwards at an alarming rate just as a car was coming along to get to the main road. I watched in my side mirror as they almost collided. Blue Sedan woman then pulled into one of the slots that we had been occupying when she arrived. Get this: the woman got out of her car and went to my SON'S side of the car (scary) and started to tell me off!

She said I was hogging the shade. Well, first of all, I was there first so neener-neener (I didn't say that) but my gosh, there were like 20 other shady parking spaces! All with the same amount of shade!

My response was a smile and a sweet, calm, "We're just sitting here for a few minutes to enjoy our lunch."

She said it was against the law for me to take more than one spot. Um, no, it isn't but I didn't say that. What if I had an RV? Or I was driving my husband's tool truck? Besides, the parking lot is private property and I don't believe traffic laws apply. (Are there traffic laws that state how many spots you can take up in a half-empty parking lot?) I told her there were plenty of other shady places for her to park. She said wanted to shop and she didn't want her car to be hot when she was done and I was not the only person in the world.

And she walked off.

I shook my head and laughed, and then I called my husband and told him about it. He told me all the choice things he would have said to her and pointed out that - first and foremost - he would NOT have moved the car. My husband was amazed at my attitude about the incident, that I didn't tell her off right there in the parking lot, that I wasn't sitting there thinking of what I should have said to the woman and most amazingly of all - he was amazed that I wasn't angry.

My thought about the incident was this: How pathetic of a person do you have to be to go out of your way to do that to someone? To physically antagonize and intend to intimidate? I felt pity for her. Her life must be a lot worse than mine if that's what she chose to do with her time. She was going shopping for new clothes - a privilege many don't have. Her actions were a reminder that nothing in life is so bad that you should go out of your way to try to hassle your fellow man. It was a good lesson for the kids, too. I don't know what bug crawled up her butt and made her so cranky or so violent, but her display and antagonism toward me for taking up three parking spots was so unnecessary that it was obvious she had bigger problems than needing to chew someone out. It was oddly...reassuring. Comforting. She made me see how stupid it is to get worked up about things you can't control. Her little temper tantrum had the exact opposite affect on me that she was aiming for. I was thankful that my life wasn't like hers, thankful for my wonderful husband and great friends. I hope the memory of the incident will make me think twice about my reactions, or actions, toward others.

Writers should see humanity in all its facets. Blue Sedan woman was one bizarre facet of humanity. I wonder if her day got better or worse after that?

Not The Average Weekend

2007-06-12T00:59:00.000-07:00

I wrote another short story. I should have been working on my novel, I know, but with all the activity in my life, my brain didn't want to wrap around the width and breadth of a novel. A short story, however, seemed within my grasp. So I heeded the call of another Echelon Press short story contest: Fast and Foreign.

It won't be a surprise to most of you that I wrote about Mexico, as it has been on my mind much these days. (I'm trying to determine a time in the remodel schedule when I can go visit my mother.) The fun part about writing this story was that my character, Rachel, was a woman who looked good in a bikini. On the eve of her vacation, she finds out her lover has more than one identity.

The whole story was fun to write, actually, and not just because of my characters. I wrote with friends. Elysabeth, Batya, Chai, and a new edition to the word-war club: my daughter, Hannah. Funny thing, it is, to be in the midst of a scene and to have your nine-year-old ask you a way to turn a phrase. My son is also a writer, and quite talented if I do say so myself, but he didn't feel the need to write a Fast and Foreign contest story. He's been working on a fantasy novel for the last year.

In the eleventh hour, my daughter had one of those contest moments that we writers all have. She decided the only way to fix her story was to completely rewrite it. She came up with a different plot for her beloved characters. She learned a valuable lesson in that she didn't get her story done in time to submit, but she did write a great story, and I'm proud of her.

Writing with friends is a singular experience. We logged on to conference chats, brainstormed, swapped stories, gave each other feedback, and generally encouraged and motivated one another. Elysabeth's character, Marie, faced a ghost from a past life at a chateau in France. Batya's character, Sarah, unearthed more than archaeological relics in Israel. Chai's character, Aleida, was caught in a flood in Holland. And Hannah's characters, Adamo and Allgeria, got lost on their vacation in Italy.

They are all entertaining stories and I hope to see them all in print.

Summer!

2007-05-25T12:31:00.000-07:00

School is officially over for us homeschoolers, which means the long, lazy days of summer have arrived. Hours at a stretch with no lessons, no errands, just me and the kids and nothing to do but enjoy the great outdoors, a good book, and all that time to write....

Only this summer, due to our remodel, we won't get long, lazy days; we'll get long days of hard work. I'm already obsessing over the constant clutter, feeling the walls closing in around me as more "stuff" ends up inside our tiny house. Even bringing in the mail can send me over the edge, or the little pieces of broken up asphalt that stick to shoes. My idea of remodeling involves a daily clean-up session and on-going organization of the waste to be removed or tidying up the debris. To everyone else's tired bodies, these are not good uses of our time and energy.

I get very tired keeping both the house and the demolition in order.

On the up-side, I'm developing my arm and back muscles. I'm hoping all this demolition will slim my backside as well. And more good knews! As those of you who have read my 9 year old daughter's blog (cortanie-animallover.blogspot.com) know, we are an environmentally-conscious family. Ridden with guilt, I loaded up the pickup with the the lumber we couldn't reuse, the gutters that we tore down, and pieces of the concrete slab - and I headed to the dump. Looking at that mountain of waste was depressing - more so, as I contributed to it. Expensive, too, as it should be. It shouldn't be cheap for people to be wasteful. Then along came my brother-in-law with a solution: he found a place that will recycle the pieces of our concrete slab AND they'll recycle the asphalt, too. Hooray! I feel much better now, though I still feel guilty about my contribution to the landfills.

On the writing front, I'm discovering a "morning" phase. I usually write at night. When I'm in the throes of a new story I can write through anything and at any time of the day. I'm in the process of analyzing my novel, Falling Short, moving scenes around and deciding what needs to be changed or deleted in each scene. This analytical process only seems to work for me in the daylight hours. Perhaps when I get to the crafting side, the rewriting of the scenes, I'll once again be able to burn the night oil.

You'll hopefully - soon - be able to read more of my short stories on Echelon and Fictionwise. I'm expanding "My Dearest Julianne", "Duty", "The Painting", and "False Idols". I'll be submitting these shorts to Echelon in June and July. "Hear The Wind Blow" isn't at the #2 spot any longer but it was great to be up there for a while!

I made the bestseller list!

2007-05-08T22:30:00.000-07:00

The bestseller list on Fictionwise, that is. I'm still waiting to find out if I'll be the first author of a short story ebook to make the New York Times bestseller list ;)

In it's first week on Fictionwise, "Hear The Wind Blow" made it to number 4 out of 509 fantasy short stories, and number 40 out of all 5,167 short stories. Woohoo! That news is motivating. I appreciate the sales. THANK YOU!

If you bought my story through Fictionwise, will you do me a favor and rank it? There's a choice on the left sidebar of your 'bookshelf' for ranking the stories you've purchased. It will help me in the long run if my readers add a favorable ranking. Thank you, again! (Echelon purchasers please post a review on Echelon. I'd like to use them in my promotional booklet.)

But...on to other writing projects.

I finished printing my manuscript. I simply must have a hard copy in my hands at this stage. I said that on the last post, didn't I? And I said I was making changes, but I wasn't very specific. Currently, I'm in the process of updating my summary outline so that it matches my manuscript because I deviated a bit and then I changed the whole story goal (the latter was in my mind, not on the manuscript). Next, I will use the summary outline to look at each scene. From there, I can edit, delete or add to fit my new story goal.

For some reason I can't do this manuscript review phase from the computer screen. (How many times have I said that?) I don't know why I need a hard copy. Maybe I need the reassurance that I've actually accomplished something? Looking at 300+ pages of printed manuscript and knowing I wrote it sure feels like an accomplishment. But, like all writers, I look at it and wonder if it was just a colossal waste of time or if it can be made into a story. This motivates me to work harder, to make sure those 300+ pages are worthy of the time and attention I put into them.

My optimistic goal is to have this draft completed by May 31st.

Beyond the novel.... Short stories seem so quick and light compared to the heavyweight, the novel. I don't have a specific goal in mind, really; I just found that working with a short story is a useful way to take a break from the novel and still keep my writerly mind agile.

Be sure to check out my Fictionwise page if you haven't already!
http://www.fictionwise.com/eBooks/JanelleDakotaeBooks.htm

Fictionwise

2007-05-04T00:49:00.000-07:00

Great news for those of you who had trouble purchasing my e-book on Echelon Press: Hear The Wind Blow is now available at http://www.fictionwise.com/eBooks/JanelleDakotaeBooks.htm. Fictionwise has secure payment options of Micropay, PayPal, and credit card.

To everyone who has purchased a copy, thank you! I'd love it if you could post a review on Echelon.

Falling Short is going through scene revisions. My trusty old HP printer died. I sure hope my backup printer holds up. I don't know why, but I cannot do revisions without having a hard copy in hand.

I'm looking at attending a conference in October - in South Carolina. That's a long way from home, I know, but I'll have friends there.

Seems everyone I know is making the most of the shorts they've written, so why haven't I? I've decided to revise several of my short stories and send them out. My short story file is bursting at the seams. I just have to remove all traces of the prompts, bring the word counts up over 2500, and they'll be good to go. Piece of cake, right?

Acting Out

2007-04-23T18:29:00.000-07:00

I talk to myself when I write. I get up and walk around or try to envision an expression, a movement, or a body language. Sometimes I use props or crayons so I can see a setting or gauge an action. Many writers do this, but most writers write in their jammies in the privacy of their homes. The bulk of my writing is done at home, too, and my family is used to my antics, but my children and I are out and about several days a week to group classes or music lessons. I have blocks of time when I'm waiting...perfect opportunity to write, right?

I get strange looks from people.

How else can I put the reader in the scene if I don't use these visualization skills? Visualization can be most effective. I use music to get me moving along on a scene, to get the mood right, or to find the right tone for the narrative. I try out different laughs to see which one fits my character. I read sentences aloud that aren't working, and try different inflections or words to get the sentence to flow. When I'm stuck, I really get vocal: I talk to myself and try to look at the plot point from all angles. If a scene is flat, I'll have my main character narrate what happened, past tense and off the page, speaking my character's dialogue as if I were him or her and I was relating the events to a friend. (It works - I can see what's missing or if the scene needs to be omitted.)

I try not to do these things in public, which is my point. If I'm in public, I try to work on editing or revisions. But when I'm getting the novel down or adding/replacing scenes, I'm in the creative process, hence the full-action writing.

At least, I hope it was my antics that caused the strange looks....

Tendonitis Frustrations

2007-04-23T18:05:00.000-07:00

The tendonitis has been a deterrent to my writing. I have thoughts, ideas, even whole scenes coming to me (with dialogue!) that I can barely scratch out on a pad of paper. I've made cryptic notes in my manuscript file on the computer. Typing left-handed only? Well, that had to stop. My south paw is too slow and I end up getting frustrated and typing with both hands, hence, the continuation of the tendonitis.

Preparing for home renovations hasn't helped much, either.

Tendonitis aside, the story must go on or I'll go crazy. I love my family - my husband and children come first in my life - but even they are aware (perhaps the most aware?) that I must write or lose my sanity. So I have tried everything: writing left-handed (like deciphering a physician's scrawl), left-handed typing (argh!), and even a typing schedule of 15 minutes on/15 minutes off (apparently, 15 minutes rest isn't enough). And slowly, s-l-o-w-l-y, despite the tendonitis, I am making progress on my novel.

But I'm excited about the story and I want to be able to get it all down! This is very frustrating.

From breakthrough to setback

2007-04-06T19:14:00.000-07:00

Tendonitis in the wrist has a way of hampering noveling progress. Could there be a better form of torture for a writer than the physical impairment of her writing hand, especially when the story is flowing?

Due to the inability to type, I have been spending mental time with my characters as I go about the necessary tasks for remodeling preparation. I think brainstorming and daydreaming are vital to my writing: without them, I don't have the zest for the story or the infatuation with the characters. Sorting and classifying household items that I haven't used in a decade is a good exercise for pondering plot lines and character sketches, story arcs and titles. The beautiful 70+ degree weather we've had here in the Seattle area the past two days has made the task of culling the useless accumulation in my garage much more bearable, but I admit to wishing we were out enjoying the day at a park or the beach. And speaking of beaches...

Our passports arrived and I am waiting to hear from my mother on the date of her upcoming surgery. A trip to Mexico is not far off. Undoubtedly, I will be taking my laptop, hoping to find some quiet moments while I'm away to write the scenes I've been daydreaming about, though my experience has been that if I'm not writing daily at home, I won't be writing daily away from home.

Still ruminating on a title, as well. For now it is still Falling Short.

Breakthrough!

2007-03-26T13:29:00.000-07:00

An exciting morning: I had a major breakthrough on Falling Short!

Backtrack: Falling Short is a complete rewrite of a project from last May. I hit it with Karen Weisner's First Draft in 30 Days and titled it Best Stressed Woman for NaNo in November. After finishing NaNo, I began the process of filling the holes in the plot - little things that came up as I wrote that needed to be filled in earlier. Then I set the story aside, unable to put my finger on what the story needed. More tinkering prompted a title change. Still more tinkering resulted in a few characters being omitted. And today...

I GOT IT! I figured out what the story needed!

On The Home Front

2007-03-24T00:41:00.000-07:00

Distractions abound. If I need a ready excuse to shift my focus away from writing, I can find one within arms reach. I share an office with my husband, my two children, the dog, and my daughter's clothing, toys and books. The office is listed on the plans as "bedroom 3" but I once saw it's dimensions listed in a home magazine as a small closet.

We've lived in this 900 square-foot house for 9 years. We had a toddler and a newborn when we bought it - our first house. With each passing year, the house shrinks exponentially. My son is taller than I am now and grudgingly tolerant about sharing a room with his little sister. The time has come to either move or remodel.

Many a writer has continued to pound away on his or her novel amidst carpenters and buzz-saws, so I won't be the first to write with earplugs or iPod if we choose to remodel. Nor will I be the first novelist to steal moments at the computer when I should be unpacking boxes of kitchen utensils, should we decide to move.

What's wearing me down is the indecision. There's a constant buzz in my ear and it's coming from my conscience, not my characters. I haven't determined why the decision is weighing heavy on my conscience, but it is.

So...to get back to my point about distractions. I hit a snag in my writing - a difficult sentence, the inability to spin a story from a prompt - and it's too easy to let my mind drift to distractions. An email from my mother, a call from a realtor, or a glance at the Turbo Tax awaiting use, and my attention shifts away. Next thing I know I'm back at the computer and the whole day is gone, lost in distractions, and the writing snag is still waiting in front of the blinking cursor. Have you ever noticed that the blink of the cursor is the same tempo as the Walk/Don't Walk signs?

Publications to check out

2007-03-22T17:55:00.000-07:00

A few publication updates from my writerly friends. I highly recommend these reads.

You can see the work of Melanie Meadors in the Spring 2007 issue of Circle Magazine. Here's the table of contents: http://www.circlesanctuary.org/circle/ Her short story is titled, "Turtle Child" and I love how she put me on that beach along with Kameko!

I just read an excellent story by Batya Deene in The Magazine of Unbelievable Stories, the self-proclaimed home of the best modern pulp fiction. Go to http://www.quill-pen.net/ (or you can find it on Amazon) and look for Batya's story titled "Little Girls" in the April 2007 issue. Don't let the 'pin-up girl' look of the back issues scare you off. Batya Deene's story is worth the read and I won't soon forget her character, Dylan Holter. I will be posting a full review of the April 2007 MUBS issue on Amazon.

I have had the privilege and the experience of writing alongside these women. They both have a unique style and genre, and I think you'll enjoy them.

The world of online publishing

2007-03-17T23:37:00.000-07:00

So, I'm learning a lot about e-books and downloads and how the whole Internet-as-a-marketing-medium thing works. There was a log-in issue on Echelon but they're getting it sorted out and ordering my e-book should be easier next week.

One thing I'm really looking forward to is being able to find my e-book on Amazon. That will be a thrill.

However, it isn't the same as walking into a Barnes & Noble or a Border's and seeing my book on the shelf. Which brings me back to where I want to be: writing! Heidi has been lazing around in my manuscript, twiddling her thumbs, waiting for me for far too long. She keeps asking me questions like, "Why can't I find a decent job?" and "What's really keeping me from meeting Dave in person?"

I know: there are medications for that. But we writers actually enjoy hearing voices. It means our characters are real for us. Now it's my job to make Heidi real for the reader.

E-book on sale at Echelon

2007-03-16T01:17:00.000-07:00

My story is up but the publisher hasn't had a chance to put the link on the front page. To find my story, go to www.echelonpress.com and click on "Web Store" on the left side bar. The first story on the top left is my story, "Hear The Wind Blow" by Janelle Dakota!

Hear The Wind Blow

2007-03-14T23:21:00.000-07:00

If the wind blows in the right direction, my e-book will be available for purchase and download either on Thursday, March 15th or Friday, March 16th. I think. I'm still a bit fuzzy on the logistics, but this link should take you to the main page: http://www.echelonpress.com.

The price of the download is $1 and you can pay via PayPal or with a major credit card by using Linkpoint Basic. If you experience any problems purchasing with Linkpoint Basic, click on "Privacy Notice" on the left side bar (warning: it's in tiny letters). Follow the directions to allow session cookies.

Hint: there's a link for you to leave a review of my story.

Echelon Press

2007-03-12T00:04:00.000-07:00

I've been working with Karen Syed at Echelon Press to get my short story Hear the Wind Blow ready for publication on March 14th. What a thrill it was to see the cover art for the first time! And a bit unnerving to go over my story for errors, knowing that any errors will be seen by all. Thanks to my wonderful WIPAsylum friends and Elysabeth, I've had an easy time of spotting those mistakes.

Family issues are presently taking center stage and I'm trying to get through the days with eyes open, alert and sensitive to the needs of my family and the inevitable changes that occur with all major life events.

Concurring with the joyous publication at Echelon Press is the end-stage of my mother's breast cancer.

There are moments when I long to dive into the pages of my novel and ignore reality. It would be so much safer for my heart! And then there are moments when I wish I could halt the furious beast we call time, reverse it even, so that I could pay attention this time and perhaps better understand my mother. Given a chance to go back, would I make any corrections? Would I change any words in the story that is my relationship with my mother? Would she?

There are no answers to those questions, so I continue to keep my eyes open and lean not on my own understanding. To experience life - to be wholly present in it - is to feel it, from the joy of winning a short story contest to the pain of my mother's final preparations.

The Thursday-Friday Blog

2007-03-08T23:53:00.000-08:00

One of the decisions a blogger should make is how often to blog. I wish to remain consistent so Thursday-Friday it is...for now.

Joyous news to report this week: I won the Echelon Press Fast & Fanciful fiction contest! My short story "Hear the Wind Blow" will be published as an e-book on March 14, 2007. See the link below.

Curious thing about Echelon is that, although the prize is nominal, the process is priceless. As a newbie writer, one of the most important things I can learn is the publication process. The contest is worth entering for the experience.

After taking this detour into short stories, I'm ready to dig into my novel again. I started outlining Falling Short in October 2006, just five months ago. I don't know why I expected to have a completed first draft by now. It was probably residual NaNo delusions.

Short stories

2007-03-02T14:16:00.000-08:00

It isn't long before the writer, having poured her heart and soul into the width and depth of a novel, is craving simplicity. All it usually takes is a hiccup in the noveling progress.

I've had a severe, recurring case of the hiccups since I began this novel in October.

Perfect solution: the short story! Here, I can visualize beginning, middle, and end. There are no tricky sub-plots to work in, no minor characters coming to steal the limelight, no derailment of the major conflict. I am in love with my work: here, I can write, frenzied, and see the immediate results! All works toward a climax, building and exposing, focused and determined.

But then I am done and I'm not in love anymore. It was a tawdry affair, a one-night stand. The limits of the short story don't allow for the pull and purpose of my novel. Suddenly, my novel is more meaningful.